#it's at least 8 mushrooms by now

[balkanradfem]

So, since the gardening season was unsuccessful, and really sad, I've been dreaming of starting new seeds. I've decided, this time, I'm going to plant so many tomatoes that nothing will be able to prevent the tomato harvest. It's gonna be all tomato garden, 40+ tomato plants, I'll build shelters for them in case of hail, weave nets, I'm ready, let's do this.

However, it's October, and there's precious little I can do in October to start plants; if I germinate anything right now, there won't be enough sun for it to grow, and it will pout and die </3. It happens every year when I stubbornly plant basil and it checks out the daylight levels and decides to nope out of that situation.

So, instead, what I'm doing, is still learning about mushrooms! I'm going to the forest regularly and collecting anything that could possibly be edible, and trying it out. I've been lucky to find so many edible boletes, I've been drying them in the summer and I have a great dried mushroom stash, which will prove very valuable during the winter.

Now there's a mushroom that grows when nothing else is really available, the latin name is 'Neoboletus luridiformis' and it looks like this:

Cool, right? A red bolete mushroom. She's called Scarletina Bolete. Looks poisonous. However, sources claim that this mushroom is edible, granted it's cooked first. I've been sheepish to try it because it's so red, and there are red boletes that are 100% poisonous, so this is just a health risk. You can check if the mushroom is this one because it stains blue and black when you cut it, and mine do. This is how it looks like cut:

I mean that does look extremely unappetizing but it says right there on wikipedia that it's edible:

hmm so anyway, I've finally decided to stop being a coward, and I cooked the mushroom and had some yesterday! It's still not been a full 24 hours, but I'm faring well for now. If this turns to be a good food source, I'll be set for the entire year because this baby grows at all times in the forest.

Another cool thing I'm trying out is acorn pancakes. I discovered some people on youtube who are making acorn flour and then baking pancakes out of it, and I've been curious about acorns before, but now I'm set with instructions and knowledge on how to process it. Acorns were used as a source of flour before wheat was in use, and it was pretty great, because they didn't need to cut down forests, or plow the fields, or turn bunch of soil to dust; people can just collect acorns because oak trees are everywhere here. The only issue is that the acorns are filled with tannins, which is a chemical that produces a very bitter taste, which makes them not very tasty. However, people have also figured out how to ''wash the tannins out', and there's a process of boiling and throwing water away, or leaving them buried next to a riverbank for a year, in order to get them to taste good.

I haven't yet decided what route I'm going to take, but I collected some acorns last time I was in the forest:

I have to admit they feel very good to hold in hand. They're so nicely brown, almost chestnut in color, they're shiny, pleasant oval shape, and very heavy. It felt like I was holding something valuable, rich. Since they're a wild food, I know they have more nutrients in them than anything we developed ourselves, wild food generally has 3 times more nutrition than anything growing in a human-made garden.

I've also stumbled on a few acorns that have sprouted roots! I've collected them as well, and put them in a soil-filled container on my balcony, let's see if I can grow an oak tree. That would feel extremely cool to grow.

I'm also collecting and curing walnuts (apparently you can make a walnut butter out of them I did not know that), conkers (for the laundry detergent, I love them), nettle (drying into powder, using as a calcium supplement) and I've also found some violets growing at this time, so I collected the leaves for tea; they're medicinal for colds, flus and fevers.

I'm going to the forest again tomorrow, and hopefully I'll write another update about fun things I've found and trying out! Stay safe and don't follow my lead to eat weird things, unless you research them yourself.

[ms-demeanor]

Hey also you know that post about getting better at cooking and handling meat and stuff?

Meat is really expensive and it goes bad pretty quickly.

If you're a new cook and you're trying to figure out how to pan-fry something so that it tastes good, might I recommend tofu?

I'm not saying "treat tofu like meat and try to replace all your favorite meat dishes with tofu" (though, I mean, if that sounds good - go for it), I'm saying "it's a lot easier to practice heating a pan and flipping objects in a pan for a meal and seasoning objects in a pan when the objects in the pan cost two dollars instead of ten dollars."

Tofu lasts a lot longer in the fridge than meat does, is easy to season, and you can easily learn how to pan-fry it into a tasty snack (or main course) and only requires a little extra prep. You can also pretend that the tofu is raw meat (the texture isn't dissimilar) and start practicing for things like how to take it out of a package or cut it on a sanitizable surface, etc.

My favorite way to cook tofu is to press extra firm tofu for at least half an hour (you can get a cheap tofu press for around ten dollars, or you can put it between two plates with some books on the top plate - this is that extra prep i was talking about - tofu cooks best if you press the excess water out), then slice a 14oz cake of it into 8 slices. I lay these flat and sprinkle cayenne pepper, mushroom powder, and smoked paprika on all of the slices, then I rub it in and flip the slices and season the other side the same way. I cook it in a frying pan with a thin layer of avocado or olive oil over medium heat, flipping every two minutes until the flat sides start to crisp up a little. Just before the last flip I add about a tablespoon of tamari sauce (you can use soy sauce, I've just got allergies) to the pan, sprinkling it over the tofu so that both sides get a little bit of sauce on them.

I have that with steamed vegetables and with jasmine rice (with two teaspoons of rice wine vinegar per 3 cups of dry rice and 4.5 cups of water). I also make a honey-siracha-mayo sauce that I dip the tofu in.

It's really good. And now I end up eating leftover rice and sauce with fried eggs for lunch at least two days a week and that's also really good.

This has become one of my go-to low spoon foods because it's so easy to make, it's filling, it tastes good to me, and it has become extremely easy for me to keep a stock of tofu in the fridge compared to the effort of keeping un-expired meat in the fridge.

I find that a 14oz pack of tofu feeds two adults for one meal, though I can stretch that to three meals if I'm the only one eating.

It makes a very cheap, filling, easy dinner that I can keep the ingredients around for without too much concern for food waste or anything going bad (the tofu that I get lasts about a month in the fridge and these days I just buy three packs every time I'm at aldi and cycle in new stock - it costs $1.50 per pack)

If you're interested in becoming a better cook, rather than worrying about actual high-risk products like raw chicken that can be seriously dangerous and also cost a fair amount, tofu has a pretty low barrier to entry while also being a good way to learn on a new ingredient that has some similar properties to raw meat.

[tojisth3rdwife]

Hiii can you do a roji fic where y/n gives toji head but right where he is about to finish,She stops and starts an argument? Like something random lmaooo

I got you 😘 sorry for the wait but I saw you and had been working on this since you requested it. It also took on a small life of its own🥰 i hope you enjoy it

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

⚠️nsfw/mdni⚠️

“Fuuuuuck just like that..just like that, baby. Shit..” Toji’s head lolled back weakly, his eyes rolling along with it as you took him deep in your throat.

You were on your knees in his living room, topless and tipsy with 8 inches of dick gliding sinuously over your tongue. Whatever you couldn't take in your mouth you stroked with your hand slowly, a technique you knew would have the man in front of you losing his mind.

Toji’s thighs were spread wide in the way he usually sat, with his shirt pushed up to his chest. You loved feeling up his abs when you went down on him, dragging your nails over the little hills and dips there with your siren gaze trained on his fucked out face. You pull off of his tip with a resounding ‘pop’, stroking Toji’s dick slowly.

“Feel good?” you cood, squeezing his dick on the up stroke.

When you stroked his tip, Toji hissed and trapoed his fat bottom lip between his pretty teeth, brows knit together in an expression of pleasure. He nodded his head frantically and you smirked, feeling empowered.

“Yeah? Like it when I stroke your dick like this , baby?” you slowed your hand but kept the pressure building over his thick shaft, the lubrication from your saliva making it easy work.

Toji cursed below his staggered breath, nodding his head more fervently as he groaned.

“Ahhshit..fucking love it..ooh shit..” he pants.

You lean his dick towards your mouth to swirl your tongue aroung his swollen tip, tasting the sweet/saltiness of the precum pearling from the hole. When you take him back into your mouth fully, bobbing your head and focusing on this tip, a broken moan rips from Toji’s chest.

“Oh fuck just like that..keep fucking doing that..” he growls and you moan around him, your hand back to working up and down his length while you worshiped his mushroom tip. You knew what you were doing. You knew from the way Toji’s hips were lifting from the couch and how his wide hand was now curving around the back of your head that he was close.

“Yeah? Like this?” you manage to mutter around his dick, emphasizing your question with a deep suck on his head that has him writhing. Your free hand was now massaging his balls, even sneaking a few rubs on his perineum to make him tense.

Toji’s jaw dropped and his watched you make love to his dick shamelessly with fire in his eyes.

“Fuck yes.. you're gonna make me cum doin’ that..” he utters breathlessly and you hum in agreement with him seated deep in your mouth. You felt his balls start to tighten up in your hand, a huge sign that he was indeed about to explode. And you were ready for him to. Ready for him to fill your mouth with his hot seed and have him watching you spit it back on his dick just to suck it off of him one more time before swallowing. Then crawl on his lap and stick your tongue in his mouth, allowing him to taste the remnants of himself there until he was hard enough to fuck you boneless into the couch.

At least that was your plan when you two first got back to his place after an evening out bar hopping with Ryomen and his girl.

Except there was something on your mind that had been nagging you all night. Something that you just couldn’t get out of your head that you were going to address before the night was over.

There was a moment when you and Ryo’s girl excused yourselves to the lady's room. As expected, it's packed with women scuffling in and out of the stalls and crowding the sinks to assess their makeup and reapply lip gloss. You were squeezing between the far wall and a small group of women primping to do the same when you heard what sounded like your man’s name come up in their conversation.

“Am I tripping or did I spot Toji in a booth with that tatted dude Ryo?”

“Fine ass, big dick Toji from the gym?”

“Girl yeah how many Toji’s you know?”

“Not enough..” the woman snickers, leaning in to glide a fresh coat of lipstick. You tuned in and snuck a glance at them in the mirror, narrowing your eyes a little to see if they looked familiar to you.

They didnt. Just two obviously attractive, Instabaddie types with long straight hair, big ass tiddies, little waists and round butts that were barely covered in their tight dresses. Granted, you looked good as hell in your own way so you had no reason to feel insecure or jealous at them knowing your man. Most people did, you were learning.

“Mmhmm..well yeah that Toji. Wit his fine ass. Ive never seen him outside of work out gear…”

“ Well I’m just tryna see what he looks like outside of clothes period..Ive never seen a man with an ass almost nicer than mine..”

“You aint lying..he be in there lifting heavy too. Know what that means.”

They share a laugh while you continued acting like you were freshening up your mascara, moving slowly as you eavesdropped.

“Wonder if he came in here with anybody? I don’t know if he has a girl or not. Not that it matters..”

You couldn’t help but lift your brow at that, now fully locked into whatever that bitch was going to say next.

“Girl, men like him are never just single. Thats alot of man right there. Even if he says he is, I bet he has a few women that he keeps in rotation. You see how people flock to him at the gym..”

“Mmhmm. Well If I don’t catch him tonight, maybe I should ask if he’s taking applications next time we meet up at the water fountain then..”

“You crazy..hurry up Lex. It stank in here..”

A few seconds later, the pair vacate their spot in front of the mirror and it was immediately filled by others needing to wash their hands and check their faces. You lingered in your corner, now eyeing the two women as they made their way through the traffic on their way out of the restroom. It wasn’t until Ryomen’s girl tapped you and asked if you were ready that you realized you’d been glaring in their direction with your tube of mascara clutched in your hand like a dagger.

It could have been the alcohol in your system encouraging this but you were too buzzed to give a fuck. So that was why when you got Toji back to his place, tipsy himself and feeling good, with his inhibitions low, you asked him.

“So who’s Lex?”

You were stroking his dick when the wuedtion rolled off your swollen lips, gaze fixed on his expression. Toji’s crinkled brow deepens in confisiok as he blinked.

“H..Huh?” He stammered, most likely because your hands were stroking his dick just right, tugging at his fat tip at a controlled pace.

“Lex. Who is she?” You repeat as you pull his dick towards your mouth just to drop a glob of saliva on his tip for extra lubrication. The sight has Toji’s whispering curses again and you knew he wouldn’t last much longer.

“Answer me, baby..” you squeezed his dick emphatically and Toji grunts in response.

“Ah! Uhm..who?” He struggled to keep up with the turn of events.

“Lex. Light skinned. Long wavy black hair. Tattoo of a rose on her left tit.” You continued, pausing to slurp Toji into your mouth a few times before pulling off and regarding him expectantly.

Toji’s expression was fixed in a state of pleasure and confusion, his brow deeply furrowed, his jaw slack, and his eyes narrow. They switch between your face and his shining dick in your hands.

“I…oh fuck..I don’t know who that is..” he manages to say, his eyes fluttering a little.

“Well she knows you and your dick size, apparently. She and her homegirl were in the ladies room keekee’ing over how fine and friendly you are with everyone at the gym.” You stroked him faster, keeping your eyes on his face.

Toji’s chest was heaving by now, sweat forming at his temple and dripping down the side of his face as you pushed him closer.

“So? Who is she?” You probe further, not even realizing how well of a job you were doing jerking Toji’s rock hard length off as you did.

“Baby I’m seconds away from nuttn’ and this is what you wanna talk about? Right now?” He whines but you are relentless.

“Yes because you're not telling me what I wanna hear and Im tryna see why random bitches are so cozy talking about my man’s dick in a public restroom like he doesn't have a girl..and now that has me wondering why don't these bitches know you have a girl! Everyone that knows me knows you're my man so why don't..”

You’re cut off by a frustrated growl, and Toji yanks you away from his dick, off of the floor, and tosses you on the couch without a word. He pushes you face down, placing one hand at the back of your neck and the other is pushing your skimpy skirt up and pulling your drenched panties to the side.

“Toj..” you start to protest but are soon stunned to silence when you feel the head of Toji’s dick prodding at your entrance.

“Shhhhh..” he hisses at you all while sinking into you slowly, one thick ass inch at a time. You tense and moan into the couch cushions pitifully, relishing in the way your boyfriend’s girth stretched you so fucking good.

“Mmhm..I know baby. Know thats all you wanted..” he teases, licking his tongue over his top lip while he bottomed out. He sets out on a treacherous pace after that, not wasting anymore time allowing you to get adjusted. That wasn’t what you needed right now anyway.

Your walls suck him in, embarrassingly wet from giving him head, and Toji grips your waist tight enough to leave a mark.

“This your dick?” He grunts, smacking into you.

“Mmhmm” you mewl against the couch cushion helplessly.

“This my pussy?” He follows up, pushing down on your back to deepen your arch, his dick thumping inside of you as a result.

“Yesyesyes..of fuck..”

“Yeah? You wanna keep asking me about random ass bitches I dont give a fuck about or you want your dick deep in my pussy?”

“Pleeassefuckmefuckmefuckmefuckmeohmygod” you slur as Toji loses all sense, fucking you hard enough to have the couch skidding across the floor, surely giving his neighbors another reason to complain to the landlord tomorrow.

Welp. That was the end of that conversation.

[freakattack]

Favorite obscure Mario characters?

GLOM

The light of my fucking life. As a lifelong koopalinghead and specifically iggyhead i slurped up the Nintendo Adventure Books like a slug slurps slime and obviously a connoisseur of my caliber would immediately latch onto this thing. It's a cloning machine Iggy made that turns sand into clones but more importantly it is a 15 ft tall clanking clunking contraption with googly eyes (to see what it's cloning, natch), a stack of CRT monitors that each display a different horror B-movie at all times, and a constant trail of slime oozing from its tank treads. If this is not your favorite Mario character of all time then you're an idiot.

2. DOUGHNUTEER

I might be the only person who cares about doughnuteer and I couldn't tell you why. Actually I can, it's because he reminds me of a little shrew

And I like doughnuts.

3. PIRANHA SUE

In addition to the Nintendo Adventure Books i also lapped up the corresponding Nintendo Comics System, which followed a similar continuity in the absence of more official sources of mario lore. I never appreciated piranha sue as much as I should have in my youth but after revisiting these comics a couple years ago i can safely say that she is the greatest bootleg piranha plant I have ever met and it is an honor to witness her evil human teeth. I want her in mario baseball.

4. HERMAN SMIRCH

Herman smirch is a terrible person and character but I am transfixed by his awfulness and so he is here. Growing up the Game Boy Comic was like the evil counterpart to the Nintendo Comics System, but now that I'm grown up and evil myself I can truly appreciate the depths of its depravity. The gist of Herman Smirch is that he is a shitty loser republican from new jersey who obtains a game boy that, through the will of Tatanga (who lives in the game boy), manipulates him into committing increasingly violent crimes until he has embroiled himself in an international military conflict. The game boy comic was supposed to make people want to buy the game boy but in practice placed it center stage in a slow burn of this already terrible man's spiral into insanity. What a yarn. I have shown a highlights reel of herman's wacky antics here but if you're too lazy to click that link then I at least want you to see this:

5. FRACKTAIL

Fracktail is comparatively not obscure at all but I don't care it's my list I'll cry if I want to. If I put fracktail here then I would technically be justified in also putting other mario rpg all-stars like Bowyer and TEC-XX and Valentina but I won't go that far, Fracktail can be here on their behalf. Anyway, the first time I saw this thing I screamed, because I thought I was going to have to fight it, and then it was friendly and then I loved it forever. And then a stupid bastardly clown came and destroyed everything and ruined my life but this isn't about him. I love you Fracktail and I wish you were still here. You didn't deserve that

6. HAL 9001

Moving on

7. WOOSTER

Before Toadsworth, there was Wooster. The original long-suffering butler to the Toadstools, Wooster was a Nintendo Comics System Special who presumably passed alongside the Mushroom King he served. There isn't much to say about his character beyond the typical trappings of Beleagured Butler, but there is one thing that makes him interesting to think about and that is the comic called "Wooster Quit". In "Wooster Quit", every Mario character is FLABBERGASTED because Wooster Quit, and they can't imagine a life without Wooster. So the whole comic is about everybody trying to get Wooster back and of course Wooster comes back and the status quo is restored. But the premise of casting this mario OC as an essential player in these characters' lives is funny to me in a meta sense because we very much do live a life without Wooster. We are living in a post-Wooster world. It just goes to show that no matter how obscure you are, you are important to someone. Even if that someone is me.

8. ROACHIE

Roachie is the cockroach living in Wario's brain. One morning, she crawled up his nose, which Wario was horrified by but not for the reason you might think: "Is little roachie gone for good?!?!!?" As a devout cockroach appreciator, I was touched by Wario's genuine concern for God's most darling creature. Fortunately, little roachie was not indeed gone for good, because that very night, Wario heard her walking around inside his skull. Yippie! Hooray! We can only hope that she is living a nice life up there to this day. Hope is all we have.

9. BRAWL DOLL

This will come as no surprise to those who know me, but if you don't know me: fellas, I fucking love ventriloquist dolls. Charlie mccarthy was my idol growing up. I'll never be half the dummy he was. So a wario-branded wooden doll is basically my ant bait. Brawl Doll is what Geno could have been if Square wasn't full of squares.

10. THE BEETLES 'R' US SNIFIT

They put me in a mario game

[dunmeshistash]

...how long does mana sickness last? for marcille it seemed like a game-ender for her, she seemingly couldn't recover in a week's time without drinking the undine, but mithrun just straight up is better in like. A day? An hour?(at thistles house) is he just built different? Maybe more offensive magic like marcille's explosions make it harder for you to recover?

In that case it wasn't mana sickness it was loss of magic power

"Couldn't recover in a week's time" she probably could! But they were rushing to save Falin, and they had to survive in the dungeon while she recovered, they already had a party that was too small and were getting deeper into more dangerous parts of the dungeon, they wouldn't have been able to keep going with Marcille not being able to fight that's why Laios wants her to go back

This is the timeline of events of this part, drained of magic on 3/22 and having to fight the dragon on 3/24 barely a day to rest, she would be in a weakened state in a deep dungeon floor and would have to fight the dragon (here's the timeline I'll be using if you want to check)

She even gets drained again after fighting Thistle, they fight thistle on 3/25 and by 3/28 when they find the Dryads she's still too weak to fight, but the next day (after a good meal) she's okay enough to fight the Cockatrice (she gets petrified but cant blame lack of magic it was lack of Laios)

Now for the Mithrun timeline, he faints from lack of magic after they eat the roasted walking mushroom and rest for a bit (I imagine he was already with low magic before from the floor one fight and then teleporting them around to stop the fall and overworked himself?) that was on 4/4

The next day he continues to be weak and faints just from teleporting them away from the wolves so he's still drained

The next day he's once again forced to use magic to teleport the griffin away, he manages not to faint but he's clearly still unwell

The day after that he doesn't need to use magic they just need to take a bath to get rid of the mushroom spores, and finally the next day they're rescued

So he first faints on 4/4 joins with the canaries on 4/8 and they only arrive at thistle's on 4/13 I believe. So he had at least 9 days from the first time he ran out, he was still VERY weak in the next few days after fainting which would be the situation Marcille would have been in for the Dragon fight if she hadn't eaten the undine.

He doesn't get drained after this does he? After fighting Marcille for the first time Kabru does say this, but he's not drained he's "on the verge"

After that Mithrun was "forced to rest" for a bit before fighting again so maybe not being fully drained and resting helped him have enough for that last hurrah when fighting Marcille?

Just checked their fight and he only uses magic to heal himself once and then one other time to teleport, even Marcille calls his bluff, that was probably his last drop now that I notice

But even with all that Mithrun is stronger than Marcille (The canaries are specialized in defeating dungeons after all they're all strong and used to combat), Kabru even mentions he has lots of stamina for an elf. They aren't really eating well these few days waiting for rescue so I imagine this contributes to why it took him a while to get better during that, he's also used to forcing himself to the extreme so even if he is almost running out in the Marcille fight he would force himself to the last drop (as he does)

Anyway, maybe it seemed like he recovered super fast during ch62 since it all happens in one chapter but it actually takes him a couple of days to get back to 100%

[0hcicero]

So I just started reading A Court of Thorns and Roses (audiobook), and am I the only one who is wondering if the author did any research into poor subsistence living or the lives of peasants? Because wow, I know Feyre’s family used to be rich, but if that was 8 years ago and y’all are poor as dirt now, somehow in the intervening period you might have learned:

- trap lines in the winter are far superior to active hunting. It burns less calories, you can use it with fish and land animals, and it will save you from frostbite bc instead of sitting in a blind for hours, you can go to your lines at certain times and head home, or drive animals toward your lines.

- buying flower seeds - or any garden seeds - is a suckers game when you’re poor. You only really need to buy seeds once!! Once you harvest, you let stuff ‘go to seed’ and then you collect it and store it for the winter, often trading seeds with your neighbours.

- they let things actively RUN OUT before doing anything about it. That’s absolutely buckwild if you’ve ever been poor — when you’re poor, you know how to make a meal stretch, and you DO IT.

- there is hunting, but no gathering?? This family has not stored any veg for winter, but neither do they go gather mushrooms, rosehips, roots, tubers, nuts, or even fucking bark?? What happened to their cottage garden?? Was it just flowers?! Were they that rich that they don’t understand that a garden produces food? Did they close their eyes as they walked past all their peasant neighbours and their gardens? Bc that’s maybe the wildest thing I’ve seen from both a historical and a ‘grew up so close to dirt poor you couldn’t tell the difference’ perspective!

- She left a whole ass Giant wolf carcass when her family is starving. Nah nah nah no that is the universe smiling on you when you’re subsistence! You will make a travois or somehow find a way to tie that to you and drag it along - that’s double the food, and possibly more money, because you could live off the wolf (which I assume does not taste great) and sell off some of the deer (which is delicious).

- she didn’t at least do a basic clean of her kill out in the woods?! She did not tan the hides?! Y’all, you do not want to be cleaning any kill on the kitchen table. Why? Because cleaning involves removing the intestines and stomach. That means shit and piss and food digestion in different stages, and the gases produced. You do that *outside*, typically at least close to where you made your kill, because you don’t want to have to have any…spills, and because it makes things a bit lighter to carry. Butchering? For sure do it on a table, but cleaning is an outdoor chore. Also, tanning a hide is not just skinning a creature! It’s scraping all the membranes off it, stretching and drying it, and curing the skin - sometimes with smoke, but often with a pretty gross solution (often including brain oil, and historically, I believe urine and/or feces, and other things with the right chemical components). It’s not a simple or quick task!

- soups, pottages, stews, with dried lentils, beans, or peas would have been the staple meals (depending on the climate and environment, but it feels fairly British thus far). Just having roasted venison (def not the best way to eat venison just from taste alone) would likely be a very very rare occurrence, because, as noted earlier, they’re so poor they would need to make it stretch. You would cure it or dry it or turn it into sausage. You would use it sparingly within a meal, not to serve as the whole meal.

- the market. If you were poor, you would likely be a stranger to spices, but not to salt. Salt is deeply necessary to survive in that period, as it’s one of the only ways of safely processing and storing meat with any longevity. And? If you got the money that they did while being as poor and as starving as they were? The first thing you would do — even if you were the most stupid rich person before then — is stock up your stores of dry goods! Flour, salt, honey, dried beans/peas/lentils, vegetables that store - onions, squashes, potatoes, root vegetables like carrots. It’s straight up Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs here - you will not give a shit about a new cloak before you give a shit about saying your hunger. They are said to be ‘starving’. Sorting out your survival comes before sorting out your fashion.

Anyways, this has been me for channel 4, reporting on anachronisms and misrepresentations in fantasy fiction. More news at 10.

[rinniessance]

jujutsu kaisen men and what their cocks are like <3 〳〳ft. satoru gojo, suguru geto, toji fushiguro, kento nanami

꒰ warnings: nsfw - mdni .ᐟ.ᐟ brief mentions of dacraphyllia in satoru's part, tea-bagging, mentions of breeding in toji's part ꒱ ꒰ notes: 2am horny brainrot, enjoy .ᐟ.ᐟ ꒱

SATORU GOJO ༊*·˚

i don't think it needs to be mentioned but that man's cock is BEAUTIFUL. it's not very thick but god it's just the perfect size, maybe even on a bigger side, i would say 7.5 to 8 inches. it's long and slender, and uncut ! ! absolutely enjoys gagging you with his cock, adores the sounds you make when he shoves himself to the hilt until you cry. frustratingly, has really pretty balls too. has a habit of slapping you across your face with his dick while tea-bagging you.

"god, dumb little thing, you look so fucking gorgeous gagged with my balls. wanna keep you like this forever."

has a prominent vein that runs from the base to the tip - you learned to lick it with long, languid swipes of your tongue, noises you are able to pull from satoru by doing it are straight up pornographic.

SUGURU GETO ༊*·˚

suguru is not as long as satoru but he makes it up by having the girth. i'd say he is around 6.5-7 inches, and has a delicious upward curve to him too - not fair because he could honestly mold dildos with how curvy he is when hard. first time you fuck, he asks you to ride him because he is obsessed with watching his thick cock stretch your hole - you try to insist it's too much but he sees how hungrily your pussy sucks him in, sheathing his dick all the way in.

"that's right, princess, ride me. god, i wish you had my view 'cause i tell your pussy is just swallowing me up."

he has a thick head too, thicket than the rest of his cock, so initial intrusion is almost always painfully pleasurable. geto also learns to reach your special spot in embarrassingly short amount of time, hits it with force every time you fuck now.

TOJI FUSHIGURO ༊*·˚

i know it's a well-known fact that toji is hung like a horse. he is both thick and long - at least 10 inches. extremely veiny: when he's inside you, you can feel the walls being caressed by his ridges. it's actually unfair just how good his dick is 'cause he is also blessed with the slight curve when erect - he's always able to hit the spongy spot inside you with the scary precision. he is hell-bent on fucking you raw most of the time, knows it drives you insane when his mushroom tip fucks his cum right into your cervix.

"yes, you love that baby? my little doll loves when i'm fucking her rough and raw, heh? gonna make you a mommy."

always has to prepare the heating pads for you and carry you around the apartment morning after because his cock really rearranges all of the furniture. all around the best dick you'll ever have.

KENTO NANAMI ༊*·˚

i would say kento is somewhere between satoru and suguru - he is around 7 inches, not very thick but has the best curve out of all. when he slides his dick inside you for the first time, you're ready to cum right there and then because he is hitting your spot without even trying. but he's curved downward so he enjoys fucking you probone, pushing hard and fast into you, manhandling just how he wants you from behind.

"you're always so tight for me like this, love. will never get enough of how well you take me."

the head is slightly less thicker than the rest of him but it allows him to always fill you up to the hilt from the very first stroke with minimum resistance.

© rinniessance do not steal, plagiarize or translate my works. do not recommend me on tiktok, thank you

[saikira999]

~ Headcannons for TWST characters playing Minecraft

This is a continuation to the answer to the last request!

I also remind you that English is not my native language, and if you find any errors, please let me know.

Another parts about:

Azul and Lilia!

Idia and Malleus!

Riddle and Leona!

[Jade]

One day, Jade was offered to play Minecraft....:

1) "A game about blocks...? Haha, it's a really cute idea, but I don't think I can find the time for it."

“There are huge mushrooms the size of trees, and You can live on a mushroom island and collect mushroom soup from mushroom cows...”

"...😊"

2) He downloaded the game that evening.

3) Before the game, briefly studied it and the topic of minecraft mushrooms, and when He went to the server, the first thing He did was go look for mushroom biomes.

Azul tried to persuade Him to settle in His village (Not in any case for to exploit the eel in a cubic version of the Mostro Lounge, or at least make a workbench to begin with), But Jade simply left.

leech wandered around the server, and soon found the nearest mushroom biome, adjacent to the village of Riddle (Poor Riddle), and quickly occupied it, starting to build a base right under the huge red mushroom.

4) When he learned that mushroom blocks cannot be obtained by hand or with ordinary tools, His reaction was literally: "....😊.....💀"

5) Fortunately, the kind-hearted Riddle gave Him a pickaxe enchanted with silk touch, in exchange for the fact that Jade would not allow her beloved brother to wander around Their and Riddle’s territories.

6) Now, He can get more huge mushrooms to build a GIANT mushroom and live in Him!

7) As mentioned above, His home is a giant red mushroom, proudly towering above the other mushrooms and the neighboring birch grove. The inside of his hat may not be so spacious, but over the course of the game, Jade will significantly expand it so that only the most necessary things can fit: a turquoise bed, chests, a workbench, stoves, decorative pots with mushrooms, etc. You can climb the stairs, and below, around the mushroom king, the Leech will build a mushroom garden (there are never too many mushrooms) with a small lake into which he will place a couple of fish from a bucket.

8) It’s even a pity that no one wants to come to visit Him.... One day, when Yuu came to visit the eel, He fed Them a couple of bowls of mushroom stew and gave Them a couple of dozen more bowls with Him, because His chests were already bursting with stews.

9) It seems that in this game, Jade is not interested in anything other than His mushroom kingdom, but sometimes, He gets out to other players to exchange, trade mushroom stew (No one buys it) or just out of curiosity. Once, an eel even walked along the seabed and found an underwater temple, but soon, He got bored with the ocean and He climbed out to the shore again, looking for mushrooms. He also often walks in the mountains, but believes that real mountains are much more interesting.

10) In general, Jade is a neutral player, but this does not mean that it is worth angering him or destroying his mushroom house... No, He certainly will not grief in response, or start a sword fight with an idiot in the game...

...He would just find and visit Him in reality....

11) The main goal for Jade is not even to kill the dragon, but to find a mushroom island on which He will build a second base and breed mooshroom...And when He, after driving a boat across the ocean for hours, finally finds muddy water and an island of the same color with mushrooms and creepy-looking cows, His smile for a split minute becomes truly sincere.

Expect that you will not get Him out of there for the next few days.

12) He built a new base, similar to the first one, and squandered all the tags on mooshrooms, naming Them all after mushrooms known to Him.

13) His favorite is Boletus. One day, She was struck by lightning, which turned the red cow brown and this made Her stand out from the crowd. Boletus lives right above, in the cap of a giant mushroom, along with Jade (Don't ask how He got Her there).

14) In a sudden change of mood, Floyd once shorn more than half of Jade's cows, making them ordinary, and almost killed a Boletus. In response to this, Jade simply left the game.... And then Floyd left the game...

And then, Floyd, for some reason unknown to anyone, did not enter the game for two weeks....

15) When the eel has completely conquered the mushrooms of the upper world, it’s time to conquer the fungi of the lower world!

Jade quickly found the crimson and warped forests and killed a decent number of the local inhabitants, so that no one would interfere with Him collecting precious fungi and their huge versions... Although, of course, He did not really understand why the Large distorted and crimson fungi were more like trees, but on the other hand, He will be able to update the interior (Jade will decorate His bases mainly with turquoise boards and decorations of warped mushrooms).

16) Oh, those long-legged ugly guys flopping around in the lava also like mushrooms? Great, so Jade will have new pets....

Jade will make a separate, third base in Nether, after He tried to drag several striders to his mushroom island, but They all died due to the rain... But in His new one, more spacious and richly decorated with various hellish vines, mushrooms and the items house will make lava pool for His new friends, whom Jade periodically feeds and breeds.

17) Jade made his own flags with mushrooms on them and hung them wherever possible.

18) Didn’t go to fight the dragon because there were no mushrooms in the End, which means there was nothing interesting.

19) Most likely, He will get bored with the game in a month or two, and each time He will go there less and less, until he finally leave, leaving His beloved mushroom cows and striders to wait for His master for eternity...

20) ...Unless Yuu accidentally mentions next to Him the existence of various mods and add-ons, and the eel goes to delicately request (This looks more like a polite threat than a request) Idia for to install a couple of mods on a dozen new mushrooms and related with them biomes, mobs and even decorative items and food...

[Floyd]

Despite the threat of being strangled, the Yuu still approached Floyd to call Him to Minecraft:

1) "Ahhh...? Shrimpy wants to play with blocks? Hehehe, this game looks stupid... You're lucky that I'm bored, otherwise I would have squeezed you long ago...~ Although... Come here, little shrimp! Play with ME, not with these stupid blocks!

(Insert aggressively tender Floyd sounds here)

2) After a session of tight hugs, after which all of Yuu’s bones began to crack, Floyd finally downloaded the game and, logging into the server, brought with him fear and horror to all the players in the area (Especially Riddle).

3) Definitely homeless. Floyd is not interested in construction and mostly hangs around, sometimes intimidating other players.

Of course, Azul invited Him to settle in His village, still naively wanting to exploit another eel in the second Mostro, but after Floyd started a fight there and blew up the wall of the restaurant (I beg you, don’t ask where this damned eel dug up dynamite at the very beginning of the game ), Azul kicked out politely sent Floyd outside to play.

4) Floyd is an unstable player. At first He is quite peaceful and calm, wanders aimlessly from side to side, watching the others and sometimes scaring other players, and after a couple of minutes, he brutally beats mobs or players, causes brawls and joins griefer raids. Floyd is the second villain of the server after Leona and the players are really afraid of him and even a couple of times, Idia had to kick him out of the server, but Floyd always came back using His brother or Azul as a ticket to enter.

5) If Jade is a tactical and careful player who uses tactics, evasion and shields during the battle, then Floyd is a tank who crushes everything in His path, not leaving alive a single monster or innocent animal he sees... And sometimes players.

6) Once, He beat Idia, armed to the teeth and dressed in netherite armor, with raw salmon to death.

7) Constantly forgets that he cannot breathe and swim quickly underwater, and is sincerely indignant when he dies at the bottom due to lack of oxygen.

8) Periodically, Floyd spends the night either with other players (Sometimes without their permission), or in the open air.

9) His favorite pastime is parkour and climbing everything possible. Sometimes Floyd jumps on the buildings of other players, original buildings in Minecraft, or a couple of times he even builds a “challenge path” for himself so as not to get bored. Sometimes Jade and Yuu help Him with construction.

10) Ortho will teach Him how to create his own worlds and install mods and parkour maps, which, surprisingly, will keep the eel busy for a long time.

11) He is absolutely invincible in joint parkour competitions held on the server and even beat Idia and Lilia in a surprisingly short time, for which he received a well-enchanted set of netherite armor... Which He almost never uses.

12) He spends a lot of time at the bottom and has already killed all the drowned people and even took a couple of tridents from them, which, however, he hardly uses and hits his enemies with the first thing that comes to hand.

13) He openly hates mushroom biomes, and only went to visit his brother a couple of times, and only because other players didn’t let him spend the night, and he didn’t want to sleep outside... And also because, there’s a little goldfish cute village nearby.

14) Of all the players, he most often pesters Riddle, sometimes starting playful fuss with Him, which usually ends in a fight or destruction of His village.

15) He also likes to mischief and mix things up in Riddle’s chests, interfere with Jamil in His kitchen on the server, distract Azul or mess with Jade... Yuu, He also often annoys, preventing Them from doing what they love and begging for attention.

16) He constantly dies and gets very angry about it.

17) Single-handedly killed the wither... With the same raw salmon...

18) Enters the server with volatile interest. Sometimes, the game suddenly becomes boring for him and Floyd doesn't log in for a few days, and then suddenly returns to make a new mess.

19) Floyd was among those players who went to kill the dragon (Ortho persuaded Him to put on armor and take with Him at least something other than raw salmon)...

And He took the raw cod.

And in The End, He was mainly busy gnawing the endermen running after other players and the dragon and sometimes switching to the dragon, continuing the aggressive beating of everyone possible... After the endermen and the dragon, He would switch to the players.

20) After defeating the dragon, Floyd played Minecraft for some time until He finally got tired of it and forgot about the server.

Perhaps He will still occasionally enter the game for the sake of parkour, but parkour in the game will never compare to the flight of a free eel on the walls and roofs of a college, under the loud cursing of teachers and the director, in reality.

Thank you for your requests! I will also be happy to receive new requests and reblogs! :D

I was asked to make headcanons about freshmen. I'll deal with it a little later~

[slvtforoldermen]

Pedro’s Characters: The Dick-tionary: Part Two

(PS. I’m currently on my ovulation week so this is gonna be mental)

Part One ;)

Frankie (Catfish) Morales:

Okay so I just finished watching Triple Frontier and oml I love this man. One thing I wanna say is, he definitely fucks you in whatever flying vehicle he owns, not during flights of course <3 safety first and I have such a bad fear of flying. Anyways, Frankie’s about 7 inches, and he has a pretty pink mushroom tip, he’s pretty thick too tbh, and he’s a vein up the side that you can feel when he’s inside you. PRAISE!!! He’s a praiser and not a degrader. Breeding kink is a must!!! Maybe it’s because he’s a family man but I feel like he has a domestic kink, like, he lovesssss talking about you being his ‘pretty little wife/husband’. Fuck, he lovessss filling you up and talking bout how he wants to get you pregnant, even if you can’t get pregnant :0, he was quite delicate with this factor at first in case it made you uncomfortable but he 100% wouldn’t say anything about that if it made you uncomfy. He just needs you to be happy. “My sweet girl/boy, spread your legs for me will ya?” “Yeah you like that, yeah you do… good girl/boy.” “Pretty little baby, taking me so so well, aw, so cute” “Take my cock in your mouth, oh yeah, just like that, my sweet, sweet baby.” He shaves well enough I think, likes to leave a happy trail to tease you with.

Agent Whiskey

Save a horse, ride a cowboy. Literally. Ride him and he’ll love you forever. Pedro’s cowboy characters hold a warm place in my heart because I find Southern accents sooooo sexy, ugh yes, talk about your farm daddy.

Um…. Anyways! Jack is so cunty I love him. Okay, he’s a big boy, about 8 inches, up there with Javier and Joel. He’s thick, like oof… Nice big tip too. Depending on the day, he switches between soft and hard dom. His fav position is cowgirl obviously, despite popular speculation, he’s not really a big fan of reverse cowgirl, but he LOVES doggystyle, he’s an ass man so spanking is a yes. He’s not a daddy man. OH MY GOD WHEN YOU RIDE HIM PLEASE WEAR HIS HAT PLEASE HE’LL CUM SO SO HARD!! SIT 👏 ON 👏 HIS 👏 FACE 👏 If he’s feeling soft and wants to be all chivalrous and his Southern self, he’ll fuck you in missionary, peppering kisses all over your face and neck. “My sweet girl/boy… takin’ my cock so well.” “Oh darlin’, ya look so pretty f’me.” “Fuck, so good, baby, such a good lil hole.” Big snail trail enthusiast!!!

Marcus Pike

I have not watched the mentalist so I apologise for any inaccuracies :( but good lord how gorgeous is this man…

Sorry guys I just can’t get over how pretty he is, but I’m actually crying because he’s so beautiful. Anyway, he’s about 7.5 inches and loooovvvvessss to be sucked off. You just look so so pretty with his cock in your mouth, and suck on his tip, his hips buckle a little and he whimpers, his hands going straight into your hair. He’s such a sweet lover, when he’s inside you, he’s so soft and gentle, you’d have to physically beg him to be rough. A BIG KISSER!!! Loves kissing you, just make sure you’ve kissed him at least 20 times and he’ll be content. He’s such a sweetie, please just be nice to him. “I love you so so much.” “Please oh baby, I love you, love this hole, so fucking good for me, good girl/boy.” “I’m gonna cum, oh please, where do you want me to cum, please tell me where to cum baby…” He likes to keep its shaved but he’s not completely bald.

Lucien Flores

Now, I have been looking for the clip of him making out and I can’t find it anywhere 😭😭 if someone could find it for me pleaseeeee send it I will love and cherish you for eternity. I also couldn’t find a gif of him so bear with me 😭.

Oh guys… MIRRORS!!! From looks and expectations and fanfics I’ve read, mirrors are a big thing for him. He’s about 8 inches. Loves doggy, he’s also an ass man. Choking you is a MUST, oh god he loves making you take him in a mirror, in doggy, with his big hand wrapped around your pretty neck, seeing you in the mirror taking him sooo well. It’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. Same thing with the bathroom. He has you with one leg on the counter, the other dangling as he pounds into you, just absolutely destroying you. Shower sex too! He has you, either against the wall or legs wrapped around his waist. In fact just let him fuck you on every single surface of the house. Bed, bathroom, floor, sofa, dining table, kitchen counter, anything!! Loves eating you out from behind. He shaves and isn’t bald, yknow standard procedure 🤷🏻‍♀️

Special Guest!! My fav TV cameo 🫶

Reggie Luckman:

My MAN!! 🥺 he whimpers, have you seen him to that pretty when you cry edit, UGH STRIKES MY HEART EVERY TIME! I watch that edit about 3 times a day. I am very well aware that he’s just found out he’s killed his friend in this gif but he’s just so beautiful…

He’s 7 inches, and has such a cute face when he’s inside you, eyes squeezed shut and biting his lip as he conceals his whimpers. You keep telling him that he’s fine to moan but he just gets so embarrassed. Such a praiser, calls you a good girl/boy soooo much. His hips stutter when he’s close, and he bites down on your shoulder, accidentally leaves hickeys on your neck and collarbones. He loves going fast. When you ride him, he looks up at with those sweet eyes, and it makes your heart melt, hands on your hips, guiding you sweetly. Tug on his hair in orallllll!!! “Please, please, you feel so good, I love you.” “Mmm, please, I’m gonna cum, can I cum in you?” “I can? Thank you, thank you, fuck!” Praise him back, tell him how he’s doing, tell him that he’s good. Pleaseeeee I need him soooo baddddd!!!!!!

[mhsdatgo]

Hotd writers choosing to adapt Mushroom's records out of everything they had in hand is the worst decision they could've ever come up with btw.

It's been stated time and time again that while F&B is purely built on records and gossip and morphed retelling of events out of bias and propaganda, Mushroom is the LEAST reliable of all the sources. He's a fool at Rhaenyra's court, his job is make people gasp and laugh, not retell historical events.

We're talking about the same guy who said that he had a penis large enough to match the size of his head, mind you. Also, he's obsessed with little girls giving BJs to Targaryen men somewhere in Flea Bottom. It's happened twice according to him.

The writers' reasoning for this choice is basically that F&B was written by Maesters and Septons, who were all greedy men, apart from being Green supporters. So anything they say is false, anything they say is written with sexist intent. Writer's intention was to do the exact opposite.

Then tell me, for the love of God, tell me, why is every woman apart from Rhaenyra, who is clearly whitewashed and I can go into heavy detail about that, basically shunned?

The Maesters claim Alicent left Viserys' body to rot and swell for days preparing and LEADING Rhaenyra's usurpation. She's the leader of the Greens, she and she alone. Not Otto. The Green Council answers only to her orders, they are loyal to HER.

I've seen people argue that since Alicent is what Maesters view as an "ideal" woman, then they would try anything to paint her in the best light possible. While I agree that this may be true, I don't think this is the case. In history books, even in real life, women are rarely painted as leaders or important figures.

For Queen Alicent to be written as THE face of the Greens, you know this mama wasn't playing around.

Now, how is this:

In ANY WAY, even comparable to THIS?:

At the end of ep.8 and quite literally the entirety of ep.9, Alicent is shown as a lost woman who doesn't even seem to know what she's doing, pushed by Viserys' last words about prophecy rather than SHEER DESIRE to get her hands dirty for her children's safety (which by the way will always be superior imo). The Green Council conspires behind her back, and on top of it all, she's yelled at by one of her own men and is made to take it like a beaten dog.

Moreover, we had Helaena's ROAST (yes it was a roast, my Queen inherited cunty lines from her cunty mother) against Aegon and her coronation, the latter being addressed as something quite wholesome, if you ask me. Alicent places her own crown upon her daughter's head and calls her "my Queen" after kissing her cheeks and kneeling. Afterwards, her and Alicent are literally written to be the only ones who could get through Aegon II's thick skull when he wanted to start the war right then and there as a result of Rhaenyra crowning herself on Dragonstone.

You hear me??? Aegon sat down and fucking listened to the two women in his life. Not the Council, them. These two were dogwalking him, the KING, on the daily, how is that sexist writing on the Maesters' part????

Yet these things are nowhere to be seen in Ryan Condal and Sara Hess' "progressive" show. We got beaten dog Alicent and Helaena being nothing but a walking spoiler machine other than yet another instrument to paint Aegon as the big bad wolf and usurper. Not a single scene of them counseling Aegon.

Baela and Rhaena have nearly no lines or scenes that don't show them in the presence of the Strongs. They are seemingly okay with anything Rhae throws their way because it's Rhae. The one and only scene about Baela openly speaking to her grandma about her wish to fight for Rhaenyra was deleted.

Meanwhile, Rhaenyra is stripped of her rage and thirst for vengeance, and instead made to negotiate for peace while in the books she was the one pushing to go to war first.

Can you tell me, again, how the fanfiction that is Hotd supposed to prove that they want to be "progressive" in contrast to the Maesters' "sexist" work, when literally all they do is whitewash Rhaenyra and sideline any woman who isn't her?

[blicketdabest33]

Y'all remember that MCYT PJO au I asked for help with awhile ago? WELL HERE'S THE CABINS AND MY EXPLINATIONS BEHIND THEM!!

#1 Zeus Cabin: Jimmy, Joel Jimmy: He's a Zeus kid, but everyone somehow forgets about it. Joel: He's competitive and strong. Also, because Jimmy is his half brother through godly parent, i get to make a fun bit about him dating Lizzie. And one of his origins in Afterlife SMP was a thunderborn

#2 Hera Cabin: Scott Scott: Scott's whole thing is loyalty. Hera is the goddess of marriage and is insanely loyal to Zeus. However, I feel like Hera should get at least one affair. So now Scott can use peacocks as weapons.

#3 Poseidon Cabin: Skizz Skizz: Poseidon kids tend to be really, really loyal to a fault and heroic, both qualities I think Skizz possesses.

#4 Demeter Cabin: Sausage, Shelby, Bdubs, Stress Sausage: This man built Sanctuary in a jungle and has flowers in his hair. He sells wood. There is no other place to put him. Shelby: Mushroom gnome, spooky mangrove witch, powerful storm witch, i need not continue. Bdubs: Moss man. Stress: SHE HAS FLOWERS

#5 Ares Cabin: Martyn, False Martyn: His planet is Mars, which is the roman version of Ares. He ended Limited Life in such a violent way, i can't help it. He was also red for the majority of Secret Life. False: I just feel like False should get to kill people more often.

#6 Athena Cabin: Grian, Pix, Owen, Xisuma Grian: This sums it up pretty well

Pix: Smart man. Archeologist and definitely a nerd. I wanna see him skipping out on training just so he can read history books. Owen: He likes to explore and discover new things in Pirates. In Rats, he's a tinkerer. In New Life, he's an explorer who wants to study hybrids. In Empires, he's a Llama who's curious about how humans work. Just a very curious character overall. Xisuma: Admin. I'm not elaborating.

#7 Apollo Cabin: Gem, Oli, Lyarrah Gem: She is an Apollo kid because of her Empire in S2. She's the sunlight princess. Apollo kid. Oli: MUSIC. MAN. Lyarrah: She writes the captions for the hermitcraft recap.

#8 Artemis Cabin: Pearl Pearl: Y'know, Artemis could've just like... had a kid, even though she took that oath. It wouldn't even have to be with a guy. Gods can change to whatever gender they want. Anyway, Pearl gets to be an Artemis kid because her symbolism is moon, she loves dogs, and will commit murder and hunt at night.

#9 Hephaestus Cabin: Doc, Mumbo, Tango, Impulse, Cub, Zedaph, Fwhip, Iskall Doc: Redstone Mumbo: Redstone Tango: Redstone Impulse: Redstone Cub: Redstone Zedaph: Redstone Fwhip: Redstone AND has a red scarf (don't ask me how that's relevant) Iskall: Redstone

#10 Aphrodite Cabin: Keralis Keralis: Okay, I don't know why, but Keralis gives me the vibes of a very charming person. His voice is nice to listen to, so imagine how useful it'd be if I gave him charm speak.

#11 Hermes Cabin: Scar, Etho, Joe Scar: Trader Scar, scammer extraordinar. Etho: All i must say is Shady-E's. I get "jack-of-all-trades, master of none, often better than master of one" vibes from him. He's funny, he's mischievous, it just works. Joe: Comedy man. Excellent delivery. And, yet again, i look at this man and go "That right there is a multi-talented man with a habit for mischief."

#12 Dionysus Cabin: Joey, Beef Joey: *points at his season one empires theme* i need not say more Beef: Idk, food. I don't really have a reason. I don't know too much about Beef.

#13 Hades Cabin: Zloy Zloy: Zombie man. He writes the Hermitcraft recaps in the dark at 2am with nothing but pure spite.

#14 Iris Cabin: Katherine Katherine: SHE. HAS. COLORS. and also I couldn't put her in Demeter cabin because Shelby is already there and i am NOT excluding Nature Wives from this au

#15 Hypnos Cabin: Bigb, XB, Wels Bigb: Sleepy stuff, right? WRONG. Gaslight. Go in everyones dreams, make fake prophecies, peace out, and cause chaos. XB: I look at his fanon design, I see an alien, and I go "aha he sleeps" Wels: This guy (@dingdinghq) said so and i completely agree. Something about sleeping in S6.

#16 Nemesis Cabin: Edit: wels not here no more

#17 Nike Cabin: Ren Ren: VICTORY. I don't know much about Ren's story in the Life Series, but I look at this man and see someone who has won a lot.

#18 Hebe Cabin: 

#19 Tyche Cabin: TFC TFC: Man goes mining and gets really lucky. That's it.

#20 Hecate Cabin: Lizzie, Cleo, Jevin Lizzie: Witchy vibes. Also, Arson. Cleo: Arson. She uses her magic for Arson. Jevin: He's a magic slime. Also, Arson. All Hecate kids love Arson.

[crazyaboutto]

The pain of being a book reader that’s been made into a show

The writers and directors literally have completed series in their hands. They have the writer’s feedback as well or at least they initially said so in season 1.

Why the fuck are they deviating from canon so much? I’m trying to think HOTD as high budgeted fan fiction but damn it’s so hard. You’re getting paid a lot and working on one of the most well known series and you just fuck up

I was already pissed with Aegon’s dream nonsense as well as Rhaenys bursting out of coronation just for shock value but it’s going downhill fast. That dream leads to absolutely nothing. We don’t even have NK like the GOT version in the books. Also, still prefer book version of Alicent both age and character wise.

It was so fast paced in season 1 and now they’re dragging the story. They’re also deviating from the canon a lot

Why does Alicent actually believe “that’s what Viserys wanted”? She wants the throne for her bloodline and that’s it. It’s her wish for power, not for actually believing in whatever Viserys was saying.

It also feels like Rhaenyra would be fine with Aegon’s usurping if Luke didn’t die. She is the throne. The war started when the greens hid the death of the king.

Why is Daemon tripping for so long? He took harrenhall and that’s it. He raised the armies 3 times before the Dance. He’s a fearsome and competent general but he’s basically just a random dude who took acid trips. Ryan saying Daemon doesn’t have the skill set to raise an army lmao give me a break

Perhaps, they do not want to show cruel side of Rhaenyra by ordering the death of Nettles and not harming Daemon after Mysaria told Rhaenyra? on one hand, Daemon might have cheated with Nettles, or it was father-daughter relationship like Mushroom thinks. It feels like they’re wasting our time with Daemon’s trips like him fucking his mother nonsense to erase Nettles.

Why are they trying to erase the connection between Valyrian and dragons? No normal person can bond with a dragon. Be it Valeryon or Targaryen, you need Valyrian blood. And the whole stupid “illusion” thing in the show.

They also wasted Laena so badly in season 1. If they’re all for sapphic representation instead of just creating buzz on internet, they could have gone for Laena x Rhaenyra moments. I’m not even sure if the adult versions were on screen together. Soon after we got older Laena, she died. It’s literally book canon that Rhaenyra was “very fond” of Laena. It’s also pretty much implied that there were things between them and ot3 with Daemon

Not to mention they erased the lesbian fighter character who loves killing men and kissing women. I’m talking about Sabitha (Frey) and her lover Alysanne Blackwood. Would rather (want to) see them acting like they’re “very close friends” than a Alicole sex scene

We don’t even have Daeron lol

We haven’t seen Haelena’s mourning well instead we saw random things. Blood and Cheese wasn’t even done properly. If you’re slowing down the pace and will end the Dance in season 3, at least show more of Haelena’s mourning. Show the sibling interactions between the greens.

Another thing, who the hell is Aeriana? Her?

I’m just reminded of how after the books ended, D&D took liberties with characters and we got the clusterfuck of season 7-8. Now I feel like they’ll do the same thing in season 3

And I fear what they’ll do with Aegon the conqueror. Like maybe he tricked Visenya and Rhaenys into marrying him and conquering the 7 kingdoms? Maybe the sisters didn’t want to kill but were forced to because they’re such angels? Or Visenya can’t fight well

Why does HBO keep making shows about the house it abhors?

[sherryclover]

“This is a fun dream! I don’t ever wanna wake up!!”

Eliana is a young resident of ramshackle dorm! She is a curious and passionate child whose dream is to explore everything!

Age: 8

Gender/pronouns: she/her

Height: 130cm (4’3ft)

Birthday: 5/22

Nicknames: Small fishie / Zako-chan (Floyd), Enfant curieux [Curious child] (Rook), small henchmen (grim), Elane (ace), etc

Dominant Hand: Right

Best subject: Arts

Club: None for now!

Hobbies: Playing the cello

Family: Uncle and Aunt..

Homeland: Earth (Japan)

Likes: Insects

Dislikes: brushing her hair.

Favorite food: Mushroom Soup

Least Favorite food: oranges

Voice claim: Strawberrycrape cookie [CRK] (JP)

Oc facts

Eliana’s favorite place to visit on campus is the botanical garden since there's many things to see there! (and find..like leona✌️)

Despite the fact that she loves cats, Eliana is slightly allergic to them. She doesn't realize this, which has her confused on why she sneezes whenever she's around grim!

Eliana loves collecting flowers and giving it to the people she admires or adores! (So don’t be surprised when you see her coming to you with a flower in her hand!^^)

Her favorite fruit are strawberries! She loves how sweet/salty they are sometimes

Eliana is actually trying to learn how to bake different kinds of sweets!

Elaina is a bit inspired by Alice ^^

Backstory

When Eliana was younger, around the ages of 3 to 5, her parents unfortunately died in a car accident, leading her uncle and aunt to take her in,

Eliana's aunt and uncle were not particularly fond of her, as she was an extremely curious child who always seemed to cause trouble wherever she went. (She didn't intend to cause any trouble, pinky swear!)

The other children thought of her as strange because she spent her free time exploring the boring things, like plants and such. (do kids even explore the outside nowadays..🙁)

Eliana didnt mind if the other kids thought of her as weird, plants like the lily of the valley are REALLY pretty! And at least she had her uncle and aunt..right?

Despite everything, Eliana would read fantasy books like "Alice in Wonderland" to distract herself and dream/wonder if she would ever experience life in Wonderland!

So, when she was transported to TWST in her sleep, she thought her dream had ACTUALLY come true. “It’s wonderful in here! I wish I could stay forever!”

A/N: So like idk if any of that made sense, it was like 5 in the morning when I wrote this.💀

Full body!

Divider

[kadtie]

My brother (no relation) and my friend recently found out they're going to be parents, so I've been working on a little something.

I doodled it at work real quick just to get a rough idea of a plan.

A quilted blanket with a fox in the middle (soon-to-be dad's favorite animal), mushrooms (for baby-mama) with eyes (she loooooves eye imagery) on the corners, and various meaningful symbologies between me and this baby's parents. (We all met each other at a bakery and I share a tattoo with each of them; a d20, and a frog with an eye pattern on it's back)

I drew a clearer second draft digitally for the fox to help me decide on shapes, then hand drew a pattern on grid paper and took a photo of each of the fabrics I bought to make a digital mock up to decide on color/pattern arrangement.

For the mushrooms I did a rough digital sketch to get an idea of proportions and shapes then did a grid paper pattern. I decided to do more mushrooms as well; some with eyes and some with dice, but all with orange caps. I ordered 8 inch swatches and fat quarters from spoonflower for the caps and bought the rest of my fabric from a local quilting store.

(One of the fat quarters, as you may have noticed, ended up being generative ai and I'm mad about it and can't use it, and will not be buying from spoonflower again or at least for a while in the future, but I am happy with the rest of them for this project)

Cutting the pieces out for the mushrooms took forever, but would have taken ten times longer if I didn't get a roller cutter and clear quilting ruler. This is my first quilt and I'm so glad I decided to buy them.

I sewed the top halves together

Then the bottom halves, which did involve hand stitching the edges of the veil (the thin piece at the top of the stem) because my presser foot on my machine is too big to do such tight corners, but it's fiiiiiine. Pain in the ass, but so worth it for the end result.

I then mixed and matched so that each of the (20!) mushrooms is unique. Even though each cap comes in a pair I made sure that each sister cap got a different stem.

Mushrooms finished!

I love them and I think they turned out amazing! As I was pressing each one I kept thinking each one was my favorite they all look so goooood!

Now I can start on the fox!

Updates to come.

[eternalflowershipping]

From Y to Y

Ship: AZ x Nerine

Summary: Nerine has an ordinary day. (Or: Tomorrow, I'll Hold Your Hand In Mine but it's from Nerine's POV this time.)

Really simple (despite the length...), I didn't do any edits cuz I'm lazy ^.^

TWs:  some suggestive language, also touches on Nerine’s intense hatred towards her younger self (which also manifests as some hatred towards her current self. Oops!) Alternate link / Neocities link (tba)

When Nerine awoke that morning, she awoke with a yelp. She’d nearly forgotten the events of the previous night, tipsy with champagne as she was. Discovering herself not only on her couch, but within AZ’s arms, was enough to sober her immediately.  He slept on, snoring softly; even when he was young, he had a habit of sleeping until noon on most days. She reached up to touch his face. So pale… I really hope he’s at least trying to take better care of himself.

From behind herself, she felt a large presence. She glanced over her shoulder, only to find Floette floating above her, a mischievous look on her face.

“Oh!” Nerine began, but was quick to cover her mouth. When she continued, she did so in her quietest voice.  “Miss ‘Ette… you should know better than to sneak up on people! A— and besides that, I was simply…” She blushed, and Floette laughed softly in response. Nerine pouted as she stood.

“Well… forget about any of that. Floette, I need to start getting ready for work. Would you like to join me?” Floette nodded, and floated down so she would sit on Nerine’s shoulder. She reached over to gently pet her round head; it was wonderful to see her with so much energy.

Alongside Floette, Nerine began her morning routine: She returned to her bedroom to brush her teeth and take her morning shower. She changed into her uniform, taking note of the fact that it needed a good ironing, but not caring enough to actually do the work. She gave Floette a piece of candy, she found while digging within her purse, then left her bedroom for her kitchen. She made a cup of coffee,  which upon being finished, was immediately diluted with all manner of sugars and caramel syrups, then set aside to cool. She cooked herself breakfast; an omelette with mushrooms and spinach (briefly, she considered if she should make one for her guest as well). She returned to the living room to peer at a still-sleeping AZ, then dragged Floette away when she took out a marker, intending to draw on him. 

It was only when she was about ready to leave when AZ awoke, his expression one of a near-delirious confusion. He squinted, no doubt wondering what it was she held so securely within her hands (Floette, who now sat atop her head, seemed all too excited by the idea of having caffeine). “Aza, good morning!” she said, and AZ blushed in response to it.  “I should have mentioned this last night, but… I have work today, so I’ll be gone.” 

She frowned slightly, her nose scrunching as she pondered her next words.

“Feel free to… make yourself at home? You can help yourself to anything in the kitchen, too. O-or, if you have something else you need to do today, you can… um.”

AZ nodded in understanding. “When will you return home?”  “Well, the museum closes at about 6:30, but I'm planning on stopping somewhere after that, so I might be here closer to 7:00 or 8:00.”

She gulped down her coffee, which had been cooled significantly by a copious amount of milk and cream. Setting aside her mug, she reached downwards to pull on her black heels, which remained at the same location they had been tossed aside the night before. Once she finished, she stood still for a moment… before reaching to pry Floette from her seat atop her head. “I can’t take you to work with me.” she said in a half-scolding voice, “Well, I could, but I think your brother wouldn’t like that.” 

Floette pouted at her words, but was obedient when Nerine decided to place her on top of AZ’s head instead. She giggled at the sight of them together. “I really need to be on my way…” she smiled sheepishly, “I’ll see you later, okay?” “Nerine…” with a stretch, AZ rose to his feet. They had been faced level while he was seated. She was used to feeling quite small when he stood above her like this, and yet it still astounded her at times. He reached to touch her cheek, careful not to ruin the makeup she had meticulously spent the morning doing. She leaned into his touch, her lips slightly parted; the paint she wore gave them a glossy colour. 

“Nerine,” he repeated, “may today be wonderful for you.” Awkwardly, he leaned down just enough to leave a kiss against her forehead. Nerine shivered in response to her, alongside making an odd little noise. “T…thank you.” “I’ll be seeing you.” “Yes, see you…” 

Though her movements were stiff, Nerine dragged herself out of her home, and into Snowbelle’s icy weather. AZ watched her, standing in the doorway as she summoned forth her Corviknight, and clamoured onto its back. She gazed back at him for a moment, and AZ waved her goodbye. Aries was quick to ascend, her wings spreading wide as she flew above the Kalos region. The experience still unnerved Nerine, despite how many years she’d been at it; she never quite got over her fear of heights. With her face buried within Aries’ dark feathers, she awaited the moment they’d land within Lumiose City.

It always caused quite a stir when Aries arrived; Corviknight were an uncommon sight within Kalos, and paired with Lumiose’s infamous “witch,” seeing her often felt like a scene from a fairytale. The old Corviknight quite disliked the attention, however, and was quick to stir up a fuss until the moment Nerine recalled her into her ball. Now standing in front of the museum, she hurried inside. The two young girls who worked the front desk greeted her. “Miss Nerine, you look tired! Did you sleep well?” the shorter of the two asked, then with a grin, continued in a whisper.  “...Did you invite a man over?”

“Of course not.” Nerine scoffed, “I'm much too busy to even think of such things!” the two girls giggled at her reaction, clearly coming to their own conclusions, but Nerine had long elected not to care about their sillier antics. 

She continued on to the backroom of the museum, taking a moment to peer at her reflection within a wall-mirror to ensure her makeup hadn’t gotten messed up.

She set down her purse, her myriad of keychains causing a ruckus with every movement, dusted off any of Aries’ feathers, and stood tall.

Today would be a day like any other. 

A surprise visit from Kalos’ own champion had caused a large amount of guests to swarm in; the museum had recently acquired a new painting of King AZ, and Serena, as well as some of her friends, wanted to talk a look. (“...Why did the artist paint him with such a small nose?” Serena had asked, and Nerine shrugged in response. “I wouldn’t know.” Nerine said. The depiction looked almost nothing like his younger self in truth, but she did not wish to say that to her.  “I know that you faced him once, but I’ve never seen him up close.”)

A large number of visitors made up a tour group. Some were clearing visiting Kalos from other regions, while some were locals drawn in by the chance to meet a celebrity.  In truth she disliked the large crows, but Nerine continued on all the same. She stood before a rendition of the Ultimate Weapon that had been drawn by an artist from the middle ages, based on descriptions from old texts. Besides it was an old replica of the ignition key, a more recent addition to the gallery.

“Up until recently, this weapon was considered a mythological object. A fable to explain the sudden downfall of a once great region. But it turns out fact is stranger than fiction. I'm sure you are all aware that this weapon was dug up, only to be destroyed in these recent years…”

Next, mention how the war led to Kalos falling into a dark age. Don't refer to Xanthos by name; the people of this era are unaware of who he truly is. You did not see Kalos’ fall. Just like everyone else, you learned it from second-hand sources. You are an ordinary woman.

“The past usage of this weapon led Kalos into a period of ruin. The king's younger brother, the very same who had once raged war against him, took on the responsibility of helping Kalos heal, perhaps in repentance for his past actions. This is why he is called the Restoration-King. Here, we see an artist's rendition of what the king's brother may have looked like…”

The painting was in truth an inaccurate one. The detail of Xanthos’ flaming red hair had been lost to time, and so he was typically depicted with the same brown as his brother. His facial moles, round chin, and wide nose were also omitted in favor of a more “traditional” look. The Xanthos of the painting was merely a hardened warrior, while the Xanthos of reality so greatly resembled his own mother. As she gazed at the painting, one of the museum guests raised their hand. “Yes? What would you like to ask?”

“Do you know about that old movie from a while ago? The Folly of Love— that was the title.” The young girl clutched a book against her chest; a historical romance from the looks of it. “The woman in that movie… Was she someone who really existed?” Ah. It wasn’t the first time she’d been asked that question, and it certainly wouldn’t be the last. She was used to it. Nerine straightened out her skirt, and replied with proper professionalism. 

“Well… it is difficult to say what is true, and what isn’t, when it comes to the past. It is likely that this woman did exist in some form, but I doubt she was anything as fantastical her counterpart within the film is!”

The group began to chatter amongst itself after Nerine finished answering. Was that movie good? I’ve never watched it. I heard that someone is trying to get the rights to do a remake!  The actress who plays Elodias in that movie is really pretty, but apparently she didn’t look anything like that in real life. Just an average looking girl. I bet the king was just using her, too. Why would he like someone like that? Nerine tightly gripped the fabric of her skirt. It was nothing she hadn’t heard before. She could handle this easily. Another girl raised her hand, and Nerine called on her.

“She was really in love with the king, wasn’t she?” she asked. “But… did the king love her back?”

Nerine tensed in response to the question.  

“That's not…” she began, only for her words to become caught in her throat. She attempted again to speak, but though her lips moved, words would not come out.

What are you doing? Her hand reached to pull at a loose strand of her hair. Acting like that little girl you were. Stop that! You're better than this, aren't you?

“I, erm…” Nerine stammered.  “I… need a moment! I apologize, it is simply— something came up! I will be back soon!”

After calling over one of her co-workers to take over the tour group, Nerine sprinted back downstairs, to the break room.

She found herself with her hands still tugging at her hair. She gripped her own coils tightly, forcing herself to pause.

She dragged herself over to her favourite chair, and sat. She slumped forward with a groan, letting her cheek rest against a cold table.

She was used to hearing such things. Questions that would have been invasive, were they not about someone who was supposed to be long dead. She had perfected her responses; she likely was real, just not in the way she’s often depicted. Modern renditions of her are often influenced by her becoming a symbol for monarchists during the time of Kalos’ revolution. No, it’s unlikely that she played any major role outside of the king enjoying her company. Yes, she supposedly disappeared from the region around the same time the king did. Yes, it was quite foolish of her to follow a man like him, wasn’t it? People make rash decisions when they are blinded by love. Did she love him? Yes, of course. Did he feel the same way towards her? Did he?

Sometimes, she didn’t know what he saw in her. She was plain and simple, with no real special talents of her own. And yet even as he grew into his kingship, he was determined to keep her around. It was possible that what he really loved was the sense of familiarity, and yet he still…

She groaned. Thinking about how she was “back then” made bile rise in her throat. So weak-willed, so easily ignored and forgotten. She spent years crafting a version of herself that would always be heard, even if it required beating her past into submission.

And yet at times, the phantom limbs of Nerine Elodias would grip her, and refuse to let go.

She lifted her head. In a few moments, she would brush her hair back down, fix up her makeup, and would resume her work as if nothing happened. She was, after all, an ordinary woman.

The long hours passed without any further mishaps.Nerine gathered up her belongings, eager to finally head out for the day. She waved goodbye to her co-workers, and headed out into Lumiose’ cool night air.

She gazed down at her watch. 6:40. The sidewalk before her stretched out and onwards. If she remembered correctly, the shop she wished to visit would be about a 15 minute walk.

Will he even still be there when I return? Nerine thought to herself as she made her way to her destination. Her heels had long grown uncomfortable, but she could surely tolerate them for just a moment longer. It may be weeks, or even months before I see him again.

Still, she continued on, and the shop she intended to visit came into view. A clothing boutique located within an old, elaborate building. The last time she visited, she had been shopping for Lysandre.Though it has been some time since then, the place still seemed unchanged. Though some signs of wear existed on the wooden fixtures attached to the boutique, it added to the charm of the design. She entered.

Being later in the day, only a few other patrons seemed to be shopping. A clerk gasped upon recognizing her. Shooing away some of her younger employees, she bounded towards Nerine. “Miss Nerine!” she said, “It’s been ages! You know, I was beginning to expect you’d forgotten about me and this little shop.” “Of course not,” Nerine replied, “I just didn’t have any excuse to come by. At least, not until…” “Not until?”  “Well, I’m… shopping for a friend of mine,” she explained. For some reason, referring to him in that way flustered her. 

“A friend?” the shop clerk's curiosity was clearly piqued. “What kind of friend is he?? Oh— let me rephrase. What kind of style does he go for?”

“He's... very tall, so that makes buying clothes a struggle for him,” Nerine began, “He prefers clothing that's a bit loose. Um…he's had a hard time lately, and hasn't been able to dress how he likes, but I think I would describe his personal style as classy, but comfortable.”

“And he's … a little picky when it comes to colours. He likes orange and green the most.” she paused, suddenly recalling an old memory. “There was one time where someone came to him, offering the finest, embroidered vest, imported from a distant land… but he rejected it simply because it was purple! He said a colour like that would've looked better on me…”

“Did he, now?” the shop clerk gave her a knowing smile. “I’m certain we can find something that suits him! Come along this way— we actually got a new collection in store not too long ago!” Nerine nodded, and followed behind the old woman. This would be a quick venture; she was quite enthused by the idea of returning home.

Though she had only intended to get a few items, the excitement of clothes shopping for the first time in a while overwhelmed her. The bag she now carried was heavy, bagged down with all manner of items. Mostly warm clothing, a variety of knit sweaters, corduroy pants, and even a wool scarf. 

He’d be upset if he knew how much I spent on him… Nerine sighed as she dragged herself over to a park bench to rest. But I don’t care. He can’t keep wearing those rags forever! The bench made an exaggerated groan when she sat on it, causing Nerine to frown. It would be just my luck if it broke now, wouldn’t it…?

As she sat, Nerine reached into the bag containing an assortment of clothing items, until she clutched an oversized sweater. Bundling it into her arms, and buried her face against it. The slightly floral scent of an expensive shopping center still clung to it. It was a great contrast from AZ, who up until the moment she made him bathe, smelled of dirt, sweat, and old clothing. She didn't mind it as much as she should have. Even as she washed his usual rags the night before, she found herself hugging his favourite green scarf.

Though she had invited him to come and visit, she was still surprised when he actually appeared on her doorstep, rain soaked and wall-eyed. Before she heard his knocking, she'd drifted off to sleep while watching her favourite show— a rather frequent experience for her.

Sometimes, she struggled to remember he was once a king. His shabby, pitiful appearance hid a powerful sense of will. The strength to bring his dearest friend back from death, then to spend the next 3000 years searching for her.

She often wondered about him. His lonely existence, his constant longing. A love that was wider than an ocean, and just as deep.

She would be lying if she said she could comprehend his dedication. She loved Floette as well, and always had. But his devotion was something far more powerful than a simple girl like her could wrap her head around.

I care about her as well. His grief when she passed… I felt it as well. Nerine clutched the sweater closer. She remembered the feeling of her arms around his body, and the alarm she felt as his frailness — as if at any moment, he would waste away. I would never wish him apart from her; a symbol of his mother's adoration for him. But I do wonder if there's any room for me in that heart of his. I think there was, once upon a time. But now…

Nerine turned her gaze skywards, where the new moon rose high above. She had made her life full in order to forget her want, but now that things were slow again, she could think of nothing but desire.

With a sigh, she summoned Aries from her Pokeball. Clutching her shopping bag in one hand, she climbed the Corviknight’s back, and ascended into the starry sky.

Back at her home, Nerine pushed open the old manor door, her limbs weary. “It is freezing today…” she sighed.  She kicked off her heels, and tossed aside her vest and the hairbow she wore with her work uniform.

She expected the usual; to be greeted with a mew from Clytie in an otherwise quiet house.To her surprise, her TV was on, playing a dull film. And not only that, the scent that lingered in the air was a delicious one, rich and buttery.

“It smells good in here…” but why…? Curious, she made her way over to the dining room. “Aza…?” She curiously peeked inside the room at first, then a soft oh! escaped her. AZ stood near the dining table, which had been decorated in her finer dishware. Sweet champagne accompanied a plate of pasta that had been set out for her. 

“Nerine…” AZ coughed into his hand, his face reddening. Despite all the work he’d put into preparing dinner for her, he was still dressed in his pajamas.  “Floette and I wished to thank you for your kindness the other night, and so, we have made you dinner. I hope everything is to your tastes…”  “O-oh! That's … that's very sweet of you.” Nerine said. She swayed gently, uncertain of what more to say. She was surprised to even see him, let alone have a home cooked meal from him. “Of course… I am eternally your servant.”

Nerine blushed, her gaze focused down at the floor. “I’m going to go get changed before I sit down and eat, but… here, this is for you.” She thrust the shopping bag into his arms, and watched as AZ’s arms slumped with the weight of it.. He peered into it, his head slightly tilted, and lifted the new scarf she’d purchased from within it.

“I know I probably should have told you what I was planning on doing,” Nerine began,  “But I know you would’ve tried to stop  me. Said it’s something you don’t deserve. Well, to me, it’s not a matter of whether or not you deserve it. It’s simply… something I wanted to do for you as someone who cares about you. I hope you can accept it.”

“Ah… thank you.” He smiled, warm and gentle. She felt her heart racing at the sight of it. “For you, Lady Nerine, I will try to believe that I am worthy of such kindness.” Nerine nodded in response. She was quick to rush off to her bedroom, hoping to hide her own excitement. He does care about me! Her mind was a twisted knot of thoughts, though few were comprehensible to her. I knew that. Of course he cares about me! So why was it so hard to…?

Nerine slipped into her favourite nightgown, intending to match AZ’s own casual style. She laughed to herself, surprised by her own eagerness. It wouldn’t be their first time sharing a meal together, but hopefully it wouldn’t be their last. I hope he knows I appreciate him, too… 

When she returned to the dining room, she found AZ already seated, waiting for her. He glanced at her shoulder, where the strap of her nightgown had fallen aside, then looked away with a cough. She sat across from him, and found she couldn’t keep herself from smiling. “The champion came by today, as well as some of her friends…” Nerine began, “They heard the museum had recently been donated a new painting of you, and wanted to see it…”

After dinner, Nerine had intended to retire for the night. Instead, she was laying in her bed, staring straight up at the ceiling. He stayed for her. He did something kind for her. She had kissed her forehead that morning, and when she sat to join him later, she saw the brief look of desire he’d given her. In his old age, he’d become much more timid. In the past, he was always so eager to sneak away with her. To kiss her in the halls of the palace that saw little use, and hold her close. Of course, she understood why he had changed. 3000 years spent desiring a single thing, and just now relearning how to have other wants. Still, she could not help but to think of the deep contrast between then and now. 

On her bed, Clytie was curled up into a ball, snoring. Nerine reached over to stroke her, and watched as she woke up, then stretched her long body out. “You’ve always been a light sleeper, haven’t you?” she said. “You’ll even wake up if I move even just a little bit.” She reached over, pulling Clytie closer onto her lap. The Espeon mewed in response, her voice pitching as if she were asking a question.

“Do you think he's awake, too? He probably is. His sleep schedule is a mess…” Nerine lifted Clytie above her head. In response, the Espeon made a soft noise of complaint. “Do you think I should go see him? I should, shouldn't I?” 

Nerine set Clytie down beside her, and planted a small kiss onto her forehead before standing up from her bed.

As she predicted, she saw a soft glow from her living room; the sign of the TV still being on. Slowly, she walked over, her footsteps soft so that she would not disturb him. AZ was spread out on her couch, his long legs awkwardly dangling over the floor. On the coffee table, Floette attempted to stay focused on the film they watched together, but was clearly struggling.

When AZ noticed her, he lifted his head slightly in acknowledgement. 

“I was wondering if you would still be awake… I tried to sleep, but as you can see, it didn’t work out…”, she yawned, “what are you watching?”

“I’m not sure,” AZ admitted, and Nerine laughed at his blunt answer.

She pondered for a moment, then came closer to him. Her eyes scanned over his body; from the lazy ponytail he'd put his untamed hair in, to his comfortable sweater which, while oversized, did not fully cover his arms.  Some day, she would take his measurements and get him something custom made, she concluded.

Silently, she crawled into his lap and laid her head against his shoulder. She could feel AZ shift, and suddenly his hand was attached to the back of her head, idly playing with her soft curls.

“I am overjoyed to have you in my arms again,” he sighed. She could feel her face warm at his statement, and the sense of want dripping from his voice. “ when I awoke this morning to find you gone, I felt somewhat distressed...”

“Oh… I’m sorry,” Nerine replied, “I didn’t want to wake you…I know you have trouble sleeping some days.”

“And I would not want you to be late for work for my sake! I will have to refresh myself on your schedule.”

“I’ll tell you about it tomorrow,” Nerine said with a nod, “I have no desire to talk about my job  right now.”

She glanced towards the TV. A romantic scene played as a blood-soaked and haggard warrior embraced his deceased lover, the sickly colour of poison clinging to her lip. When she gazed at Floette laid out on the table, she’d finally fallen asleep.  

“...You know, I expected to come back and find you gone. You never liked to stay in one place for long, especially if it wasn’t a necessity for you.” Nerine drummed her fingers against his shoulder, her voice nearly inaudible. “I didn’t want you to. I hoped you would stay.”

“Is that so?”

“N— not that I would have been upset if you had somewhere else to be! I just…”

“I’m glad,” he interrupted, “I had assumed you would be happier were I to leave; I do not wish to be a bother to you. I am glad that you enjoy my presence.”

“Of course. We’re…” Nerine paused, frowning. “Well, we’re rather close, aren’t we?”

“Very close,” AZ agreed. He lifted her chin so that her gaze would be fixed on him. Her breath hitched, her bottom lip wavering. His thumb brushed gently over her lip, pressing into the soft, pink-toned skin. “I am glad to be close to you, my Nerine.”

She watched his mouth part with an inaudible gasp, as if he'd recalled something. His own eyes gazed back at her with a rare gentleness.

He leaned towards her, and Nerine did the same; their lips met, and Nerine felt electricity running down her spine, filling every small nook of her being. She whimpered against him, and prayed he did not hear it.

“I apologize…” AZ said in a hushed whisper, “I find it difficult to restrain myself around you.”

“It’s…” Nerine began, though her voice cracked. “It’s fine…”

Unsure of what more to say, hid her face in the fabric of his sweater. She could hear him laugh softly before resting his hands on her lower back in a loose hug. It was almost strange. They’d spent so long apart, and yet interacting with him like this… it felt as if she had truly come home. 

…it would be okay if he stayed for just a little bit longer, wouldn't it…?

[climbthemountain2020]

To Know That I'm With You - Chapter 8

Nessian | Ch. 8 | Ao3

Eternally, @popjunkie42 has the keys to my heart and my google docs More cave time and getting to know each other, while resisting getting to know each other lol

Nesta woke slowly, the gray glow of morning casting fuzzy shadows over the jagged walls of the cave. She had slept deeply, despite the stranger a few feet away from her, his breaths still steady in the chilly air. When she opened her eyes, she’d been facing him in sleep, her body turned and curled on its side as though she hadn’t been trusting enough to turn away. 

She’d dreamed of wings flying across the sun. She wondered if they’d been his. 

He was turned towards her too, his face boyish and relaxed in the dim light. Despite the gruff look of him–the deep, dark brows and scars and jaw– he looked peaceful. His teasing tone the day before felt like less of a show and more accurate to his true nature when she could see him like this. There was no posturing, no preening. She was struck by how much she believed this face reflected his real self, even though she really didn’t know him at all. She wondered how she looked when she slept.

Her breath came in small puffs of mist as she breathed in the damp chill of the morning. The fire had been reduced to embers overnight, and she would need to build it back up before she left if they were going to stay. The persistent ache and burning in her hip told her they would be. She glanced up, finding there was a good bit of wood left in the cave. 

Who had been here before? she wondered, trying to picture the strangers who had slept in these same places. 

She was glad, though, that she’d thought to toss a blanket over Cassian’s legs before she’d drifted off. She wasn’t sure if whatever kind of creature he was got cold the way humans did, but this morning was chillier than it had been. Perhaps the seasons shifted here just the same as on the other side of The Wall, and it was edging towards winter. Regardless, she needed to get up and get the final ingredients to make the poultice– the longer it sat, the more effective it would be. She’d need to get a good look at his wings today, but her guesses put her around at least a few more days in this cave while he healed. 

She’d seen the plant she needed only a ways back, not far behind where she’d encountered the beast yesterday. She could make that trek easily, and hopefully get back and have it made and applied before midmorning. She turned the covers back and winced when she rose. The poultice would help her, too, though she’d need to wrap it to keep mobile. She gingerly set two more logs where the fire was, stuffing it with more tinder from her bag and blowing air on it gently, hoping the embers might catch. Once they did, she set out into the morning with her sword.

The woods weren’t much different than normal, but Nesta felt tight as a coil. Before yesterday, she had thought that the monsters only came out at night. Now, she knew better as she crept through the fog. She traced her steps back to where she’d seen the plant she needed, not willing to wander around the misty bog any more than necessary. She grabbed handfuls of mushrooms as she went, knowing she’d need to feed them both for a few more days at least. The air was thick and chilly, clinging to her skin as she moved soundlessly through the trees. She gripped her sword in both hands as she passed the corpse of the beast, noticing with a grimace that massive chunks had been torn from its body overnight. 

Cassian had taken that monster down. 

The words sounded unbelievable even in her own mind. 

What was he?

Not far past that, she found a large cluster of the plant, shining, deep green leaves standing out amongst all the brown and gray. The smell was sharp as she pulled it from the earth, minty to the point of her eyes stinging. She pulled an armful for good measure, tucking it into the small bag she’d tied to her waist before turning back. She didn't want to waste any more time here than she needed to, the pull to return so strong that it made her jumpy. 

It’s just nerves from yesterday. Certainly not because I want to get back to the cave.

She dismissed the thoughts with a physical wave of her hand, annoyed with it. She had never been connected to anyone except for her sisters, and even that relationship had always been fraught with tension. Nesta knew she’d been a means to an end for her sisters, and she didn’t mistake their need for her for any sort of familial love. She had provided for them, made sure they survived and thrived as much as they could. She had run the house and kept things going the way she was supposed to, and they’d been grateful, she supposed. But one had left her as soon as she could, and the other had been prodding and hoping and trying to do the same politely for years now. 

Everybody left, and it was easier not to care in the end whether they did or not. 

Cassian, this stranger , would leave, too. She barely knew him, but she understood that. They would heal, his wings would strengthen, and then they’d both be on their ways separately again. 

Why does the thought of that hurt?

She almost growled as the words passed through her head. The frustration mounted as she practically stomped back to the cave. Nesta was not some damsel in distress. She’d survived almost a month in the wilds on her own. She shouldn’t be swooning over this man simply because she’d watched him use a sword. 

Use a sword to save my life from a monster.

But she couldn’t deny it was nice to have someone around again. She’d been alone in the woods for so long with no one to talk to. She’d needed that, when she left. It had been good for her thoughts, to focus on what she’d set out here to do, to get away from. But she could admit to herself that she’d gotten a bit lonely. It was nice to hear a voice other than her own.

She heaved a frustrated sigh. Now, she was arguing with herself. This wasn’t like her, didn’t make sense to her. The man was as annoying as he was intriguing, and Nesta shouldn’t care whether he wanted to leave or not. The intention didn’t matter–he would go, just like everyone else, when her use to him was up.

She tamped down her thoughts as the cave came into view again, shoving them away for another time. 

Or never. 

She would treat him like the stranger he was, and when she left here, she would be all the better for it.

Cassian was stoking the fire when she entered the cave, his body propped up and the flames highlighting his bare chest. Nesta hadn’t had a chance to properly see him from the front yesterday, but now, splayed out against the wall of the cave, he looked utterly indecent. She twisted her body away as soon as she entered, refusing to look at him any longer. 

She pulled the bag away from her waist, setting out the plant with the others from the night before and putting the mushrooms to the side. She gathered the necessary ingredients and tools to get to work, and began tossing them into the largest bowl while she set water to boil again. They’d need to find a water source soon. She’d consult the map after all this was done.

“Morning, sunshine.” The words sounded out from behind her, his voice low and rough with sleep. They rolled down her spine and settled warm into her stomach, and she felt goosebumps break out over her arms. 

What the fuck is this?

She ignored him, crushing the flora beneath the rock in her hand. 

“I worried you’d abandoned me this morning when I woke up.” His tone was teasing, but there was an actual undercurrent of worry in it. Barely there, but she heard it nonetheless. 

“I left my stuff,” she muttered, keeping her back to him. She heard his wings shuffle, the scuff of his boot against the cave floor.

I will not look. I will not look. I will not–

“Good to know you wouldn’t forsake me here.” He chuckled again as he spoke, and Nesta ground the plants harder against the bowl. 

I will not look.

“Nesta...”

She looked. 

The way he’d said her name had been like a summons from a deity, a demand of some god, despite its softness. He’d said her name quietly, reverently, but he might as well have tied a collar to her neck and pulled. 

He was leaned back against the wall still, his wings carefully maneuvered to keep from being pressed into the stone. His entire torso was on display, almost lewdly, for the way it showed off his physical form. Apart from the wings, he could be mistaken for a human man. Except, Nesta noted, she’d never encountered a human man who looked even remotely like this. She was furious to reach his face and find him smirking smugly. She’d been ogling him, and of course he’d noticed. 

Despite the prideful smile she ached to slap from his face, he didn’t say anything. 

“What?” 

“Thank you.” He said the words simply, the smile more earnest now. The flush rose into her face and she looked back down. She was flustered.

“Roll over. I’m going to put this on your wing.” 

His eyebrows jumped, though to his credit, he immediately began to maneuver to the floor. 

“Someone’s demanding today.” 

Nesta rolled her eyes and huffed in response, gathering the cloth and water to wipe him down and the poultice for after. She scooted closer to him, waiting patiently for him to drape his wing across her lap. As he did, she already could tell it was beginning to heal, knitting together much more quickly than human skin might. The blood had crusted over in the night, and she would need to soften and clean the wounds before she applied the strong smelling poultice. 

“What in the Cauldron’s name is that smell?” he questioned through a grimace.

“A poultice. It’s for healing.” 

“It smells like mint and nightmares,” he responded warily.

Not far off , she thought. “Hold still.”

She wrung the cloth out, making sure it wasn’t too warm, then draped it gently across the wounds on his wing. He startled so violently beneath her that she worried she’d kicked him somehow. 

“Too hot?”

He answered through gritted teeth. “Just surprised, is all.” 

She hummed noncommittally and began soaking another.

“So what were you planning to do yesterday before I arrived? Kill the beast from the inside? You looked mighty fierce with your sword.” His voice held a laugh in it, but Nesta stilled. 

She hadn’t had a plan. She’d just expected to die. 

With everything that happened in the aftermath, she hadn’t really had time to stop and process, and her throat grew tight now that she did. Two close encounters in barely three three weeks’ time. She breathed in tightly through her nose.

Cassian stilled beneath her hands, and suddenly, she was terrified for him to ask further. She didn’t want to think about how she’d been ready to die. Didn’t want to think about how her last thoughts had only been that she’d hoped it was over quickly. 

She began to move the cloth slowly over his wing, the dried blood softened enough now to clean. Whether because he understood, or because the pain was distracting him, Cassian chose not to ask any more questions about yesterday. 

She took the second cloth and swapped it with the first, wringing it out and softly brushing it across each of the wounds. They had healed substantially overnight, her stitches holding well and the membranous flesh already melded back together wholly in some places. Perhaps only two more days here would be enough. Beneath her, Cassian let out a strangled sound and she paused her slow strokes. 

“I could get more of the char root, if you’d put your pride aside this time.”

He let out a strained laugh into the arms folded beneath his face. “It’s not pain, exactly.” 

Not pain?

“Not–”

Oh. Oh.

Nesta had not considered that his wings would be sensitive in that way. He had wanted to be the one to clean them off yesterday. He had flinched when she touched them. 

Oh, god.

She panicked, jerking back near violently. “Oh, my god. I am so sorry. I–should I–”

He laughed face down beside her, though the sound seemed to crackle a bit. “It’s fine. Are you almost done?” 

Nesta was so red and hot she could feel it from her chest to her ears. Her skin was on fire, and she must have been the shade of a tomato. 

Mortified. I am absolutely mortified. And I’ve just been sitting here, stroking this man like…like…

“Almost done with this part,” she squeaked and finished as quickly as possible, grabbing the poultice from the floor. 

She had never touched a man that way. Intimately. Plenty had tried before Tomas, certainly, but Nesta had forced them all off, shaming them as much as possible in the process. She was no stranger to her own hand, or the feelings that came with it, but she’d never done anything like that with another. 

And here he was, laid out in front of her, this stranger he didn’t know. At her mercy. And still, he let her touch him in a way that was strangely personal.

She couldn’t deny that Cassian was an attractive man. A very attractive man, who she’d just as good as…

“You could have at least let me ask to court you first.” The words from Cassian were so light and the implication so crass that Nesta let out a laugh that came out sounding more like the bark of a dog. It effectively dissolved the tension.

“My god, I am so sorry. I had no idea. Why didn’t you say anything?”

“You just launched right in today, and I thought I was going to be able to handle it.”

To handle it, he said. 

He hadn’t been able to handle it when I touched him . 

Nesta rolled that statement around in her mind. She liked it more than she should. 

“I just need to put the poultice on now, but you’ll have to lie still for a few hours after I do.” 

“That’s fine.” 

“Do you, uhm, do you need to relieve yourself first?” 

Cassian turned his head back over his shoulder and looked at her, grinning and eyes twinkling. “No worries, princess. I already went while you were out. No need to be embarrassed.”

Any levity left her as she scowled. Her father had called her and her sisters that as children. The diminutive was as horrid as ashes in her mouth. “Don’t call me a princess. And I’m not embarrassed.” She lifted her chin. 

“Okay, you’re just blushing because it’s hot in here, then. I’m sure.” 

She leveled him with another glare as he turned to lay back flat. Nesta grabbed the bowl with the sharp smelling paste in it, eyes watering as she brought it closer. It smelled stronger here than it did when she made it for Feyre’s various cuts and scrapes, but still with the same heavy peppermint tones.

“This might sting a bit at first, but it won’t last, and you’ll need to hold still while it dries in.”

“Yes, Madam.” 

She wanted to shove him. He was so cocky, the smug tone of his voice and the broad grin laid bare in the way he spoke. His tone was so easy, so casual with her. None of the strange back and forth required of the children of rich families when they spoke. Cassian spoke to her like they’d been friends for ages, like they knew each other. 

He hissed as she smeared the first swath of the paste gently over his stitched wing, his back tensing visibly. 

Uncharacteristically, she wanted to comfort him. “It won’t sting for more than a moment. But I’m going to keep going.”

Cassian nodded into his arms, and Nesta pressed on with the application. She could see his whole body held tight as he braced himself, the harsh smelling herbs getting to work as she’d hoped they would. She worked quickly, and was finished in moments, Cassian’s body relaxing down as he turned his head and rested it looking at her. 

“I’m sure men somewhere pay lots of money for that,” he quipped happily. Nesta's face boiled red again. 

“Do the people where you're from find this humor funny?”

“They find me funny.”

She scoffed. “I’m sure that’s what they tell you.” 

“You’re a feisty one, aren’t you?” His smile was broad–all white, glinting teeth, two of which caught her eye. 

Fangs. 

My god, the man had fangs.

Two tiny, bright teeth, pointed amongst the others. The wings had almost become commonplace to her, the sight not inspiring so much awe after a day together, but for some reason, the fangs seemed to throw her. 

She shook herself out of it, ignoring his question as she brought the bowl back to her side of the cave. She’d need to apply it to her own leg soon, but there was no way she was doing it with him watching her like this. 

“Quit moving so much. You’ll ruin the poultice then we’ll have to start all over again.”

“Oh no, we wouldn’t want that.” His words were mocking, but not in a cruel way. It was almost more of a challenge, a joke.

She ripped her attention away, prodding at the fire and starting a bowl of porridge. Cassian was blessedly and surprisingly silent as she did, the quiet nice as she took stock of the food and wood they had left, deciding when she’d need to venture out for more.

She had enough for a few more days, but the meat was almost gone. She’d need to figure out the hunting aspect of being in the wild sooner rather than later. She had the book Vilja gave her with instructions on trapping and bleeding and skinning, but she’d been hesitant to put it into practice. It was one thing to see it on paper, another entirely to do it with her own hands.

“How long have you been in the woods?” he asked, just as she’d spoken up her own question. 

“So what’s the Night Court like?”

She met his eyes, alight with the fire and trained on her. “I’m just going on three weeks out here now. I came up from The Wall and have been traveling since.” He seemed surprised to hear it. 

“You walked through Spring, Autumn, and Winter?”

She nodded. “Walked, limped, traveled through caves that I assume are magical.”

He looked a little disbelieving, and that feeling of pride settled in her own chest for once. She let herself preen. She felt the urge to tell him about her experiences– the sneezing in Spring, the party in Autumn, the injury in Winter. Then she remembered herself, and the excitement died. This man wouldn’t be interested in the everyday events of her life. He was simply avoiding awkward silence by making conversation with her. She prodded at the skin full of water above the fire, giving her eyes somewhere to be other than on him.

“So, the Night Court.” 

Cassian shuffled his position on the ground, careful of the wing holding the nearly-dried poultice on it. “There are many different facets of the Night Court, so it depends on where you're going.”

“How different could they be?” Nesta quipped, thinking of her own experiences. True, she had walked a fairly direct line through each of the courts, but they seemed pretty steadily consistent as she had. 

“The Night Court is enormous, and made of smaller sub courts, in a way.” That was interesting. 

“Are all courts this way in Prythian?” 

He shook his head. “Night is really the only one. There’s the Hewn City, a massive mountain with a palace on top from which the High Lord rules. Within the mountain are the inhabitants of The Court of Nightmares, as well as the Darkbringers. They form part of the court’s military legion.”

“The Court of Nightmares ?” Nesta inquired, eyebrow raised, her body fully turned to him now. 

He smiled at the question. “It isn’t so bad. Mostly all for show.” 

She understood posturing in certain situations, certainly. Once you reached a level of money or power or nobility, there were expectations and standards for appearances placed upon you whether you wanted them or not. 

“And what of the other parts?”

“Farther north, there are the war bands in the mountains. That’s where I’m from.”

“Does everyone there look like you?” She gestured at the wings and he grinned again.

“If you mean do they have wings, then yes. They’re the aerial faction of the Night Court’s armies. But if you mean do they all look like me, then no.” His smile was wolfish and Nesta did her best to ignore the comment entirely.

“Another group of warriors?” 

Of course, the humans had armies, men who weren’t from the nobility trained to fight if the need arose. Still, two factions in one court seemed excessive. “Is the Night Court particularly keen on starting wars?” She expected another smile from him, that teasing lilt, but Cassian was serious when he spoke again. 

“No one likes wars, Nesta.” His words were so haunted, so somber, that she turned away again, worried that she’d upset him but unsure of how to fix it. She wasn’t good at talking to people, it turned out, even when she didn’t force the bite into her voice. The water was almost boiling, so she pushed the sticks holding it off the fire, letting it cool enough to pour. 

She was surprised to hear him speak again. “It’s the hingepoint of the culture. They’ve isolated themselves from the rest of the Night Court, and they pride themselves on their brutal ways. It’s where I’m from, but there are a lot of torn feelings in my upbringing and distaste for the old ways.”

Nesta had turned back, staring at him wide-eyed while he spoke. It was a lot of information offered, a vulnerability to it that surprised her. “And they refuse to change? To be brought up to date?”

He looked sad when he answered. “Many of their methods are effective. They’re the most efficient militant force we have. It doesn’t make the methods right . But change is slow-coming. It has to be a balance between allowing them to self-govern while still ensuring that they answer to the governance of the Night Court.”

“You seem to know a lot about politics. You said you come from this place. Why are your views different?”

“That’s a long story, for a different day.”

Nesta shot him a look. “Yes, we’re so low on time.” 

Cassian smirked in response, a spark back in his eyes. “I didn’t stay there. I was taken from my mother, I didn’t know my father. They put me in the Illyrian training camps as an orphaned bastard, and I climbed my way up. I just happened to beat the shit out of the High Lord’s son enough times that we became allies.”

The words all rushed out in a huff of air, but a fond smile graced his face at the admission. 

“You beat up the High Lord’s son? Aren’t they considered royalty here?” Nesta knew precious little from the notes scribbled in Vilja’s hasty scrawl in the booklets she’d packed, but she knew the courts were ruled by a High Lord apiece. She wasn’t sure exactly what that entailed, but punching their son didn’t seem like a smart choice. 

“He was a little asshole,” Cassian laughed. “His mother took me in, raised me alongside him at the camps when she could. We begrudgingly came to accept each other, then became allies, then friends, then family. Being shown that side of the world changed my perspective. Her kindness changed my mind.” 

The sentiment was overwhelming to Nesta. A mother’s love, and not even from his own. What might that feel like, to be unconditionally cared for by a mother who had love to give?

“She sounds like a lovely woman.”

“She was.” The spark in his eyes guttered out.

“She’s no longer alive?” Nesta wished she could take the question back at the sadness on Cassian’s face. 

“No. She died long ago, her husband, too. And their daughter.” 

God.

To lose an entire family. Especially when they genuinely cared for each other. She had not exactly mourned for her grandmother when she’d passed, nor her mother, exactly, either. She’d mourned for a life lost, certainly, but it had been hers, not theirs. She had never felt loved by them, never cared for. She wasn’t sure she’d recognize the feeling now. Her sisters cared for her, but distantly– a caretaker and not a friend. They were in each other’s lives by requisite, by birth, not by choice. 

She loved her sisters, but…

But not enough to stay… a sinister voice whispered in her mind. She shook the thought off. 

“That must have been hard.”

Cassian nodded in the firelight, the light catching on his brows and jaw, tight and serious now.

“So, your brother. He’s the High Lord of Night now?” She wasn’t sure if titles worked the same way across The Wall. Did they drift down through families the same?

Cassian just smiled. “He is. He’s grown much better at it over the years.”

It was strange to imagine the man in front of her as the brother of nobility. She stirred the water into the bowls or porridge and handed him one. “Can you eat from that position?” 

He twisted his lips as though he’d stopped himself from saying something. 

“I’m sure I can manage it. Thank you.” He held the bowl in one hand and tipped it into his mouth. “You’re a good cook for someone living in the woods.” 

Nesta enjoyed the rush of pride at the comment, but demurred. “It’s truly not that hard. And I’ve clearly not always lived in the woods.” 

He scoffed. “Tell that to my brother. Couldn’t cook his way out of a bag.” Nesta thought of Feyre then and laughed. 

“My sister, too. I’m sure she could burn air over an open flame.” 

“Well, to siblings unable to cook.” He lifted the bowl as though in cheers, and Nesta lifted hers in response. 

“And to those who judge them quietly for it in a cave.” 

She fought a smile as they ate, the warmth of it settling her and making things feel a bit better. Cassian finished his in record time, handing the bowl back to her. She had the oddest feeling like she’d be missing this when it was gone–the companionship of it. Talking to him was easy, the words coming as though they’d been practiced. Nesta didn’t talk to anyone this way. She didn’t know him, and she could be unguarded in a way she’d never been with others. No expectations, no standards to hold. Just Nesta herself, in a cave in the woods with a stranger. 

“So the Illyrians. They live in the Illyrian Mountains, I presume?”

Cassian nodded. 

That’s a new piece of information. Is the witch Illyrian, too? 

She itched to pull out her map. 

Might Cassian know about the mountain? Maybe there was some lore he could fill me in on that Vilja hadn’t known?

“That’s where I’m going.” The words were out before she could think better of it.

“ What?” he hissed out. Nesta pulled back, the quiet peace of their cave abruptly shattered by his sudden change in tone. 

“ What ?” she echoed back, accusingly, suddenly on the defensive. 

He pushed up on his arms, eyes locked on hers. “You can’t possibly think you’re going to Illyria.”

Now, she was affronted. He was reacting like she’d told him a horse had sprouted wings and begun to fly. Damn the conversation they’d had; her defenses flew back up, her armor plating her emotions as she lobbed her words.

“And why not?”

He gestured madly at her. “You’re human!”

Her cheeks flared red, with rage or with embarrassment, she wasn’t sure. “Yes, we covered that yesterday.” 

“What could you possibly need in Illyria?” He had pushed up to sit now. 

“Stop fussing! You’ll ruin the poultice.” She was already wondering if she had enough to redo it when he messed it up and still fix her own.

“ Fuck the poultice, Nesta! Why are you trying to get to Illyria?”

“Don’t yell at me!”

“I’m not yelling!”

“You’re yelling right now!”

“So are you!” The silence hung between them after, no additional words being said and no sounds in the air except the heavy breathing between them. They were closer than they had been, the distance between them closing as they’d yelled. Nesta was furious, her blood buzzing in her veins and her hands aching and numb with the need to clench her fists. 

This man was maddening . No one argued with her like this, save Feyre. Even then, Feyre was more likely to just run off rather than run her mouth. 

Nesta wanted to punch him. Part of her, distantly, wanted to press her lips against his. 

She was so aghast at the thought she reared back, closer to the fire.

Why is he so under my skin?

After a few moments of silence, Cassian spoke again. “Can you just tell me why you’re going? There’s nothing there for a human. There’s barely anything there for anyone.”

“The witch told me I needed to. There’s another witch in a mountain there. She apparently needs something only I can give her, and I’ll get something in return.” Cassian looked at her like she had two heads. 

“A witch,” he said flatly. “In a mountain?”

“Yes, in a mountain,” she snapped back. “I have a map.” Part of her screamed at her to keep her secrets close. The other part of her raged to prove him wrong so fiercely she felt it burning in her chest like a roaring inferno. She wanted to wipe the patronizing disbelief off his face.

She stomped over to her bag, huffing. She grabbed it and thrust it out to him, and he took it and unfolded it gingerly, his eyes rising to meet hers twice before handing it back. 

“This map is blank. I assume you can see it, which means it’s enchanted for just you.” She took it back, looking over the print as she had every day. 

Only for me . 

She folded the map back up, tucking it into her bag and looking back at Cassian who was still sitting up. “What does she want from you?”

“I don't know,” Nesta answered honestly. 

He looked flabbergasted, almost angry. “You don’t know and you’re still going?” Obviously, she knew there were faults in her plan, but hearing them pointed out like she was an idiot was making the rage rise inside her like a tidal wave. 

He didn’t know why she’d taken the deal. He had no idea what she’d been through.

She’d started trusting him, stupidly. But he was just as disappointing as everyone else.

“Well when you say it like that…” she mocked. 

“It’s dangerous there. Illyria is full of beasts and monsters and creatures like me who won’t be as kind.”

“And you’re kind?” she snapped back, hating that he flinched back at the accusation. He didn’t miss a beat though as he responded.

“I’m a million times kinder than any you’ll find there!” 

She folded her arms firmly across her chest, ignoring that it made her feel more like a petulant child than anything else. “Well I suppose I’ll find out!”

“You’re not going.” There was a growl in his voice she hadn’t been expecting.

“Who the fuck do you think you are?” They were yelling again. 

“You’re human!” 

“We’ve covered this!”

“Don’t be stupid, Nesta!”

“I’m not stupid!--”

“Then stop acting like it!” he roared, his fist connecting with the floor of the cave, the sheer force of it cracking the stone ground beneath them. By reflex, Nesta flung herself back, her body immediately going into flight. 

She was there in the cave, she was there in the barn. 

She could see the fire in front of her, but the image wavered between that and two horses, screaming as she fought to get away from an assailant. 

I’m fine. I’m safe. I’m fine. 

She got her breathing under control, but not quickly enough. When she looked back at Cassian, there was no anger in his eyes. Nothing left there but something like pity. She hated it.

“I’m sorry.” His voice had lowered.

“Don’t apologize.” Her voice was embarrassingly breathless. She was already turning away, desperate to busy herself with something else. 

“I shouldn’t have reacted that way. I don’t know what happened. I’m not–I’m not myself right now.”

The words wrung something out in Nesta. She hadn’t been feeling much herself lately either. 

“Let me escort you, then. If you’re determined to go.” His words sounded more like a plea than a demand.

Nesta spun at that. “What? No.”

“Yes, Nesta. I’m going back to Night anyway, and I can’t fly. What are we going to do? Walk parallel the whole way and not speak?”

He had her there. She ignored the voice inside her that rejoiced at the thought of a companion. She was so riled up and so mad, her body still pulsing with adrenaline from her reaction before. She stuck a dagger in the loop of her pants and felt mildly better. He mistook her silence for a no, and spoke again. 

“Please, Nesta. You’ve helped heal me up. Let me return the favor.” She didn’t mention that healing him was returning the favor for saving her. Couldn’t verbalize what she wanted to say, her kneejerk reaction to send him away so she could return to being alone as she always had been. 

She fought to say the words, ready to take flight off her tongue like a bird on a branch. 

But she couldn’t.

She didn’t want to be alone anymore. 

“Fine.”

“Fine, we’ll walk parallel the whole way and not speak? Or fine I can come with you?” The teasing lilt had returned to his voice and Nesta threw up her hands in frustration, refusing to turn and look at him. 

“You’re infuriating. I’m going to get more mushrooms. Stop moving around.”

She checked the sigils were still good as she left, the chilly air making it hard to take a full breath. Her chest ached with some unshed emotion, some strange suppression of her trauma manifesting into physical pain. Her mind had slipped her right back to that barn momentarily, the fear in her heart as real as if Tomas had tracked her over The Wall.

She wandered, plucking mushrooms as she went and grumbling. By the time she’d calmed, the sun was already sinking low again. Nesta didn’t have a clock, but something about the way the days were here made her feel like they might be far shorter than the nights. Her shirt tail was filled with herbs and mushrooms, and there wasn’t much of a way to waste time past that, so she began the trek back to the cave, that persistent ache in her chest lessening with each step. 

She felt betrayed by herself, by her own good sense. 

But still, when she reentered the cave to find he’d bolstered the fire, she softened against her will. He was passed out on the ground again, his face slack and calm with sleep. Despite earlier, she knew, somehow, he wouldn’t hurt her. She felt it deeply in her marrow. 

He was concerned for her wellbeing, as she was concerned for his. 

Perhaps he was fighting it, too. 

She threw the mushroom and herb collection down by her bag and tossed the blanket over his legs again. She checked the poultice quietly, not wanting to wake him lest she have to speak with him again. It was mostly intact still, at least in all the areas that mattered, so she stirred the remaining poultice and applied it to her own leg, wrapping gauze around it to keep it in place as she slept. It hurt badly, the soreness radiating through the cut and deep into her flesh. Hopefully, the poultice would make a difference by morning.

She worried that sleep wouldn’t find her, that the events of the day were too much, but it dragged her under immediately. That night, Nesta dreamed of wings in the sun, the blood red warmth of them enveloping her and keeping her safe from the world outside the cave.